Today, my boss found out that my girlfriend dumped me. He asked if that meant she would no longer bring her delicious homemade cookies to the office. When I said yes, he fired me on the spot. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend came to my workplace to tell me she was breaking up with me. My boss, who was passing by, fired me for "chatting with friends" during work hours. FML
Today, my boss fired me because his girlfriend wanted the job I had. She has no experience whatsoever in my line of work, it was just his "anniversary present" for her. FML
Today, I was driving to work and I got a text from my girlfriend. She said she was breaking up with me. I was a little heartbroken, but I had to get on with my day. I got to work and my boss fired me. Turns out, my boss and girlfriend have been having an affair and she told him to fire me. FML
Today, I was fired from a managerial position I've held for two years due to "inappropriate relations with a subordinate": I was dating a coworker. My girlfriend then broke up with me four hours later. Because I no longer had a job. I hired her. FML
Today, my boss fired me after chewing me out for the horrible date he had with my mother. FML
Today, my boss decided our 4 year relationship was unethical, so she broke up with me, then terminated my employment. FML
Today, my boyfriend was fired. After breaking the news, he also broke up with me. Apparently, his boss had a creepy crush on me and would give my boyfriend bonuses for bringing me to company events and, occasionally, out on the boss's personal boat. Looks like I am no longer useful. FML
Today, my boss fired me by locking me out of my workplace after I went out to throw out the trash. FML
Today, someone had been stealing my brownie at work every day, so I sprinkled cocolax on one and waited to find out who the culprit was. Turns out it was my manager. Needless to say, I'm fired. FML
Today, my boss left early, so I decided to take an extended break and run home. I found my wife in bed with my boss. I got fired for leaving work. FML
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Top comments
EmilyJane718 12
Sounds like your boss is a dick.
Mauskau 36
Is that even legal?
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Comments (149)
EmilyJane718 12
Sounds like your boss is a dick.
chany25 7
give the man a cook... or actually don't
bigtaytay 13
Sounds like OP needs to sue for wrongful termination
negb 30
And a "criminal" because I'm pretty sure that's illegal
RedPillSucks 33
Unlikely. Texas is a "Right to work" state. Which means they can fire you for any reason, as long as it doesn't have anything to do with race, gender, or sexual orientation.
JMichael 26
There's no sounds like, his boss is a dick. That's a dumb shit reason to fire someone.
Kamon97 23
Wtf he can't even do that ******* sue the bastard OP
DavidKnows 11
YDI Obviously you brought SO little value to the nob, that you should have been fired earlier for not performing better. You were lucky to have lasted as long as you did. Wrongful firing lawsuit is weak, since your boss probably has a long lisp of reasons why you were ineffective. There are 10+ hard wanking people who want that job, and would work harder for the paycheck than you did.
caysters 12
Hard wanking people? I guess if that's what the boss is into...
zomgbies 17
#45 is right. Wrongful termination lawsuit coming up!
HJKM_fml 19
Sounds like a call to HR is in order. Sorry to hear that OP and best of luck with either getting your job back or getting a new one.
kodyyblue 19
#83 And you know all of that about OP just from this post? You must be psychic!
hunts19ketchup 23
#83, There was absolutely nothing in the FML to suggest that the OP is a bad worker. That being said, I wouldn't be able to take you seriously even if you had a valid point because you said "hard wanker"
crazydave1998 6
maybe op was a really crappy employee...
Cadillac4427 8
#83 DEFINITELY DESERVES MORE thumbs down....smh #83, I presume you know OP's work ethic and history to make that statement ?
incoherentrmblr 22
...and the wrongful termination lawsuit begins...
712sash 26
Sorry to hear that, OP. Your boss is a dick.
JesterJosh 5
OP better learn how to make cookies is how I see it.
CarbonCoach 11
Fyl op you're boss is a dick. Hope you find a better paying job!
CarbonCoach 11
Your not you're... for the grammer nazis. :)
R3TROxLOV3 32
You really shouldn't correct anyone's writing if you can't even use proper punctuation.
AllieCat21 21
Grammar*
OptimusVader 23
Spelling, not punctuation.
SRNH 3
For the record, he was correcting his own, even though he did make another mistake while he was at it.
Zmeilerr 22
Sounds like he just lost a real hard worker.. You can do better OP!
BoltTheSuperdog 22
Try offering to bring cookies.
SmuggletheBudgie 15
Or offering to bring the relevant workers rights groups in to get the boss in deep shit over wrongful termination.
Mauskau 36
Is that even legal?
xwolf760x 6
Ya it's legal unless he was fired for age , sex, religious, disability discrimination etc. write ups are a formality to reduce the risk of people claiming stuff like that
alycion 39
If it's a right to work state they can pretty much fire you on a whim.
Kruiser 16
Yah isn't that wrongful dismissal or something? Of course I'm no lawyer..
brandoneyez1 25
It's legal only in right to work states . If it was for example, California, then no because you must have a cause in California to fire someone. Also, being the case she can get unemployment benefits and depending on the state could suit and win.
SmuggletheBudgie 15
That is so bullshit. How can some of your state governments do that to you? I could not imagine working knowing that if I slightly piss my boss off I may as well pack up and go home.
BillMurray_fml 12
#55 on the flip side, how would you feel if you were a business owner and your government told you that you had to employ someone you didn't feel was a good fit with your business, but otherwise did a decent job?
NereidAlbel 14
If Texas is a Right to Work (AKA: Right to be Fired) state, then yes, it's legal.
AbeFrohman 10
California is an "at will" state. Only being fired for discriminatory reasons is actionable.
Amber1234567890 8
Florida is a right to work state. They can fire you for any reason at all. Where I used to work, they never even gave is breaks & when I asked if that was even legal I was told that since it is a right to work state that no they do not have to give you breaks if you are over the age of 18, which is bullshit. Op, your boss is an ass. You deserve to work for a company who's going to appreciate you!!
Rodville 28
As a former employer (store manager for a chain supermarket) in Florida I can tell you that you HAVE to give breaks. That has nothing to do with Florida being an at will state. But I could fire people for anything that was not listed. But if I didn't give even one break in a 15 year employment and fired that person because his t-shirt was offensive then I can be sued out the ass for that missing break.
VfortheShadow 8
#73 Right to Work is something different. It's At Will Employment.
fballdt16 9
Yes it is actually. As long as the boss didn't fire the person based on gender, ethnicity, religious beliefs, and in some states sexual orientation, then the boss is allowed to terminate anyone's employment for no reason at all.
BoltTheSuperdog 22
And if that's the reason he kept you, then he kept you for all the wrong reasons!
enix82 5
No cookie, No job !
ohSNAPyall 27
No money, no ticket!
bushada 18
Every time I read FML's like this I can't help but wonder if I should say you should fight for your job back or be glad you don't work under such an asshole anymore.
AyeJay101 25
File for unemployment!! But what kind of boss would fire you like that or for that?
annie_nk 23
Not just unemployment, but wrongful termination.
AyeJay101 25
That all depends, maybe OP was a slacker and boss was being nice because of cookies. Either way, we don't know the whole story.
luckyone365 7
Unemployment if for when you get laid off, not terminated