Today, my boyfriend was fired. After breaking the news, he also broke up with me. Apparently, his boss had a creepy crush on me and would give my boyfriend bonuses for bringing me to company events and, occasionally, out on the boss's personal boat. Looks like I am no longer useful. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I received a mass email from my boss saying we had a position open at the daycare I work at. I knew my boyfriend was looking for a job so I insisted he apply. Later at work, my boss takes me into her office and tells me my employment is being "terminated". My boyfriend is replacing me. FML
Today, my girlfriend came to my workplace to tell me she was breaking up with me. My boss, who was passing by, fired me for "chatting with friends" during work hours. FML
Today, I was fired from a managerial position I've held for two years due to "inappropriate relations with a subordinate": I was dating a coworker. My girlfriend then broke up with me four hours later. Because I no longer had a job. I hired her. FML
Today, my boss decided our 4 year relationship was unethical, so she broke up with me, then terminated my employment. FML
Today, I was fired from my job. Why? Because my boss has been dating my newly divorced mother, and he didn't want family get-togethers to be "awkward." FML
Today, after getting fired, I went home only to find my boss sitting my living room. Apparently, he and my mom had been dating for months and he felt compelled to let me go because it was a "conflict of interest". FML
Today, my boss found out that my girlfriend dumped me. He asked if that meant she would no longer bring her delicious homemade cookies to the office. When I said yes, he fired me on the spot. FML
Today, my boss broke off our relationship because he said it's inappropriate. I really liked him, but I accepted it and respected his integrity. A few hours later, I found out he's now dating my colleague. FML
Today, I was fired from my job. The reason? My boss didn't feel comfortable paying his son's girlfriend. FML
Today, my boss fired me because his girlfriend wanted the job I had. She has no experience whatsoever in my line of work, it was just his "anniversary present" for her. FML
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Top comments
liindsey 25
On the bright side, it means you're attractive enough for someone else at the very least.
untoldfame 3
At least you can go out with the boss now. He has a boat! BOATS AND HOES!
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Comments (74)
korpik_fml 0
lmao that sucks, thats a big FYL
DoNuTizPrOnuT 0
wow. that sucks, but you still got owned =S
Lolbrittany 0
Be useful and maybe you'd have a boyfriend |:
Trollinggx3 0
YDI for not knowing you were being used.
Andywalker 0
get with the boss
IchBeinEinTier 0
71!
liindsey 25
On the bright side, it means you're attractive enough for someone else at the very least.
Ozmat 0
Did you actualy go on these boat trips with this "creepy" boss?
untoldfame 3
At least you can go out with the boss now. He has a boat! BOATS AND HOES!
humorizer 14
HE'S ON A BOAT!
slash1396 0
win!
falcon_paunch 0
#5 ftw, BOATS AND HOES! XD
mopho 0
Well, was it at least a Nice Boat?
ididitmyself 0
DEFINITELY go after the boss. he sounds rich. better than your bf anyway since he dumped you
fuzzybrownbear 0
Don't do what #6 said for why she said it. That is a ****/***** move.
aback 5
Sounds to me like the boss found a new crush and that's why he fired the boyfriend.
ididitmyself 0
ya.....you are a jerk. i said better than your bf anyway at the end... because i was kidding about the first half. please go kill yourself.
Joseph9 4
Heyy now..the please kill yourself wasn't necessary. There are people that actually would to.
ZombieSazza 34
I ain't saying you a gold digga...
jessenia123 27
you're a stupid bitch
divineinstrument 2
Well, it is just a really convoluted way of gold-digging
plexico 4
The boyfriend was the gold-digger, the OP was just the shovel! Her boyfriend was just a miserly pimp making extra cash enabling his boss' masturbatory fantasies. It's sad, really, that she was just an unpaid, unknowing ***** during at least part of their relationship.
turnedoffTVgrey 0
Hey plexico. I hope this isn't weird but I just wanted to reply to your comment a few days ago about being married but not really happily. I just wanted to say that you sound ******* hilarious and I hope you have (or will eventually find) someone who appreciates your unique gifts. I think you deserve that. That's all I wanted to say. Please don't rip me a new asshole because I was being sincere.
plexico 4
Thank you, turnedoffTVgrey. I'm not angry with you. Quite to the contrary, I am very touched by your kind words. I wrote you a longer note earlier, but the comment system has apparently eaten it. If it doesn't show up in a few hours (which sometimes happens), I'll rewrite what I can remember.
fallen_dragonkin 12
date the boss.
moonlight_daze 8
YDI for being a Texan.
blameyourself 0
So you kind of got fired too. This recession is really hurting.
elSMUT 0
lol
lexiBRo 0
lol...good one
CountDuk 5
She wasn't invited on the boat. Her BOYFRIEND received the bonuses. OP: That really sucks. You should date the boss, if he's young and attractive! :)
Ozmat 0
Well, wrong. The way it's worded if he brought her to company events, and onto the boss's boat, he got bonuses. She could be referring to him getting the boat ride, but that's not the way it is written.
zolziski 11
I think what was meant was that her ex boyfriend would get bonusses if he took the OP on the boat with him, not send her on the boat alone with the boss.