Today, my boss forced me to come into work despite having a bad cold. While waiting a table, I violently sneezed and sprayed a child's face with snot. His dad got so pissed that my boss had to pretend to fire me just to calm him down. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I have food poisoning. My boss told me that if I didn't come into work, I'd be fired. Not 30 minutes after sitting down, I sneezed and shat my pants. My boss still won't let me leave. FML
Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML
Today, it's my first day at my new job. Unfortunately, I have a very bad cold. When my boss leaned in to show me something on the computer, I sneezed all over him. A hell of a first impression. FML
Asshat
Today, I woke up with a sore throat and a stuffy nose. As my boss is an asshat who hates allowing sick leave, I thought I could power through it, but halfway through my workday I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. I had to go home early and now I can't move without pain. FML
Flirtatious bubble
Today, at work, I was standing at the till helping an attractive man. I have a cold and could feel the snot bubbling up. He orders and we flirt for a bit. Just as I'm about to hand him his product, I sneeze quite loudly and forcefully all over his face. Guess I won't be getting that number. FML
Seize the day
Today, I dragged myself to work, suffering from a bad cold. My boss quietly told me to go home and rest, to avoid spreading it around the office. I thought it odd since he dislikes me so much, but I did as he said. He called later in the day to suspend me for leaving work early. FML
New face
Today, I went back to work after being sick for a week. While I was gone, they hired a new manager. Trying to score bonus points, and possibly a raise, I went to shake her hand and introduce myself. Just as I was about to say, "Hello, my name is…" I sneezed right in her face. FML
Menace to society
Today, I sneezed so hard during a meeting that my glasses flew off and hit my boss in the face. Now everyone keeps jokingly ducking every time I look their way. FML
Today, while meeting some of the big boss guys at my new job, one of the men sneezed on his hand and then grabbed mine for a handshake. I felt every gooey bit of his snot between our hands. FML
Let it all out
Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML
Top comments
2C0OL4SCH0OL 17
It's your boss's fault for forcing you. I guess he regretted his decision but hey at least he didn't fire you for reals, well I hope you get well soon
johnjkl 22
Hope you get better op
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Comments (97)
mswim 27
Ugh, that's just nasty! That's so unsanitary, your boss should really have thought that through. But at least he didn't fire you for real. Poor kid though, now he's going to get sick.
Sphanz 17
Thank goodness that he pretended and didn't acually fire you. Hope you get better
alanna_ann 14
I sure hope you atleast tried to cover your mouth otherwise that's on you
kbryan0004 11
At least your boss didn't really fire you. There is a little plus and truly this was his fault. still, I'm sorry for the embarrassment. :/
Queen_of_Night 20
I had a co-worker, a cook, who was very sick and our boss forced him to come in anyway or else he was fired. He did and obviously looked like shit warmed over. When I asked him if he was going to be ok, he said not to worry, he's got it covered. About 30 minutes after opening, a health inspector came in. He took one look at our cook and demanded to know why he was working around food that people were about to eat. He was immediately sent home, with the biggest grin he could manage. The next shift he was on I asked him where does he manage to find pants to hold balls that size. Corporate was contacted. Our boss almost got fired over it.
Brandi_Faith 34
Brilliant! That cook is awesome! Calling a health inspector (anonymously) and tipping them off is a brilliant idea. And it sounds like the boss got what he deserved!
fonkimonki 7
I know who didn't deserve it - the kid. He seems to have done worst out of this. I hope he gets offered a free meal without snot
Fergud 6
Get well but at least you weren't really fired but if that was me I would have giggled for getting a headshot of snot
Spencer_40 14
Well, you didn't get fired so I see nothing wrong
ssnow_fml 20
plot twist, your boss wasn't pretending.
ThrottleJockey 36
You blew it.