Today, my boss asked me if I'd realized that "I support ISIS" was written on the bottom of my water bottle. The bottle was a gift from my dad. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked my manager where the clearly-foreign customers were from. She said she didn't know, but she thought they were from ISIS. She wasn't trying to be funny, she thought ISIS was a country. FML
Today, I was at a work lunch, and the waiter brought me a soda I hadn’t ordered. I thought it was a free mistake, so I took a sip. It was actually my boss’s drink. As soon as I noticed, I tried to give it back, but he just stared at me and said, "It’s fine. I’ve already seen you drink it now." FML
Today, for my birthday, someone left a big bottle of mouth wash on my desk with a big bow on it. FML
Today, I got back to work from a 3 week vacation. My boss had asked me to get him something so when I returned I presented him with a shotglass with the British flag on it. I later found out that he is a recovering alcoholic. FML
Today, during our office Secret Santa gift exchange, I unwrapped my gift to find a mug that says, "World’s Okayest Employee." Everyone laughed. My boss added, "Well, it’s accurate." FML
Today, my boss mistakenly drunk-texted me and was talking shit about me. FML
Today, my boss wrote me up for saying "pissed" in front of a client. This is the same boss who nearly pissed himself laughing when a client made an extremely off-color Holocaust joke a few weeks ago, in front of half the department. FML
Today, my boss decided to post a photo of a piece of crap on Facebook. He tagged me in it. FML
Today, my boss bragged to a coworker, in front of me, about how much money he saved on a project because he majorly underpays me. My boss is my dad. FML
Today, I saw one of my employees sipping from a beer bottle at work. I marched to his desk, snatched the bottle, and said, "Drinking on the job? You're fired. Get out." I then looked at the bottle. It was kombucha. FML
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Top comments
Soninuva 41
That's a prank that could have serious repercussions. I hope you have a long talk with your dad.
barisozdemir 24
that's a terrible joke. especially these days..
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Comments (86)
darthhera 11
Who wouldn't support Isis? Bad ass Egyptian goddess right there.
I can't stand leg puns! 23
Isis was a Greek Goddess. Of Rainbows and messages... ._.
Soninuva 41
You're thinking of Iris, the goddess of rainbows. Isis was the wife of Osiris, and both were major Egyptian deities.
writergirl1029 17
Does your dad secretly hate you? That could have gotten you fired or arrested by the feds.
daynanance 9
Dad, I got fired. Apparently my boss thinks I'm a terrorist... I guess this facial hair was a bad idea...
Britt125 16
Wow, horrible on your dad's part. At least your boss asked you about it though, instead of outright firing you... that could have gone much worse.
GrumpyGrinch 23
FYL for having a stupid parent. Your luck though that at least the boss had brains to tell you. I wouldn't accept ANY gifts from such a dad any more. Just to be safe.
hfslkp47012759 28
Yikes...911 YDIs?
chuchusheep 19
is your dad trying to get you killed?
beantownchivette 8
Uh oh. Try a piece of duct tape to cover it up
TheNewGuy03 29
The boss already saw it. It's pointless at this point.
HarleyGal12 18
At least he asked without immediately accusing you of anything. But I agree with a lot of people, your dad's joke was in poor taste
aZzwipe 18
your dad is ****** up