Today, my boss asked me if I'd realized that "I support ISIS" was written on the bottom of my water bottle. The bottle was a gift from my dad. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I asked my manager where the clearly-foreign customers were from. She said she didn't know, but she thought they were from ISIS. She wasn't trying to be funny, she thought ISIS was a country. FML
Today, I was at a work lunch, and the waiter brought me a soda I hadn’t ordered. I thought it was a free mistake, so I took a sip. It was actually my boss’s drink. As soon as I noticed, I tried to give it back, but he just stared at me and said, "It’s fine. I’ve already seen you drink it now." FML
Today, for my birthday, someone left a big bottle of mouth wash on my desk with a big bow on it. FML
Today, I got back to work from a 3 week vacation. My boss had asked me to get him something so when I returned I presented him with a shotglass with the British flag on it. I later found out that he is a recovering alcoholic. FML
Today, during our office Secret Santa gift exchange, I unwrapped my gift to find a mug that says, "World’s Okayest Employee." Everyone laughed. My boss added, "Well, it’s accurate." FML
Today, my boss mistakenly drunk-texted me and was talking shit about me. FML
Today, my boss wrote me up for saying "pissed" in front of a client. This is the same boss who nearly pissed himself laughing when a client made an extremely off-color Holocaust joke a few weeks ago, in front of half the department. FML
Today, my boss decided to post a photo of a piece of crap on Facebook. He tagged me in it. FML
Today, my boss bragged to a coworker, in front of me, about how much money he saved on a project because he majorly underpays me. My boss is my dad. FML
Today, I saw one of my employees sipping from a beer bottle at work. I marched to his desk, snatched the bottle, and said, "Drinking on the job? You're fired. Get out." I then looked at the bottle. It was kombucha. FML
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Top comments
Soninuva 41
That's a prank that could have serious repercussions. I hope you have a long talk with your dad.
barisozdemir 24
that's a terrible joke. especially these days..
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Comments (86)
Badkarma4u 17
Maybe its not a joke. Maybe he does.
laarsje 5
That's just terrible..
mixximoo 24
You need to make your dad aware that the Isis situation is nothing to joke about
simongren 5
I would get a sharpee or whatever he wrote it in and change it to something I actually support - crysis core or pictures of hearts, or whatever. Then I would internalize the message that my dad was trying to get me fired, beaten up or killed and just remember that when it was time to pick out his retirement home
cloudydays 10
Now put a bumper sticker that says the same thing on his car
fatal4life 10
There is always room for funny dad pranks. This was not one of them
mads_nicole 19
That's honestly probably the worst joke...terrorism is definitely NOT something to joke about. At least you didn't go to like an airport or something!!
homtravel 10
Count yourself lucky that the policemen didnt barge into your office and get you handcuffed at your desk
Badkarma4u 17
OP lives in The US. They cant do that. OP has freedom of speech.
Etweens96 25
You got a good boyfriend on ya cause he was able to tell you. I would have a long long talk with your dad about his sense of humor
False_Stupidity 42
WTF? Where did a boyfriend enter the picture here?
Etweens96 25
Sorry! My phone made it say boyfriend and I didn't notice!! My mistake!
Sinmaker8888 4
part time dad full time savage