Today, my boss asked me if I'd realized that "I support ISIS" was written on the bottom of my water bottle. The bottle was a gift from my dad. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I asked my manager where the clearly-foreign customers were from. She said she didn't know, but she thought they were from ISIS. She wasn't trying to be funny, she thought ISIS was a country. FML
Today, I was at a work lunch, and the waiter brought me a soda I hadn’t ordered. I thought it was a free mistake, so I took a sip. It was actually my boss’s drink. As soon as I noticed, I tried to give it back, but he just stared at me and said, "It’s fine. I’ve already seen you drink it now." FML
Today, for my birthday, someone left a big bottle of mouth wash on my desk with a big bow on it. FML
Today, I got back to work from a 3 week vacation. My boss had asked me to get him something so when I returned I presented him with a shotglass with the British flag on it. I later found out that he is a recovering alcoholic. FML
Today, during our office Secret Santa gift exchange, I unwrapped my gift to find a mug that says, "World’s Okayest Employee." Everyone laughed. My boss added, "Well, it’s accurate." FML
Today, my boss mistakenly drunk-texted me and was talking shit about me. FML
Today, my boss wrote me up for saying "pissed" in front of a client. This is the same boss who nearly pissed himself laughing when a client made an extremely off-color Holocaust joke a few weeks ago, in front of half the department. FML
Today, my boss decided to post a photo of a piece of crap on Facebook. He tagged me in it. FML
Today, my boss bragged to a coworker, in front of me, about how much money he saved on a project because he majorly underpays me. My boss is my dad. FML
Today, I saw one of my employees sipping from a beer bottle at work. I marched to his desk, snatched the bottle, and said, "Drinking on the job? You're fired. Get out." I then looked at the bottle. It was kombucha. FML
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Top comments
Soninuva 41
That's a prank that could have serious repercussions. I hope you have a long talk with your dad.
barisozdemir 24
that's a terrible joke. especially these days..
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Comments (86)
GEFStryker 29
This is where watching Archer can come in handy. I was so confused when I started watching the show mid season 3 when all that crap was on the front page every day.
warrenhoward42 20
your dad played a mean prank ._.
worldclassrager 41
Internal Science In San Francisco That's one option but there are more
vikky538 29
Terrible terrible joke
fantasyworld 39
That's a terrible joke that could have serious repercussions.
captaincarlz 17
At least your boss was nice enough to point it out. There are a ton of bosses on FML that would have a tantrum and fire you on the spot without even telling you why.
wolf12king 12
Your dad clearly doesn't watch Archer. Seriously that is the only way this joke could have been sort of okay is if he glued a picture of the globe from Archer and then wrote I support ISIS. Even then the joke would still be questionable.
xFiiRe 19
I hope he doesn't think that this is funny...
Colon_Man 17
Is this a disposable bottle? If it's one of those hippie reusable ones, this joke just went to a place - nay, a "zone" - of extreme peril.
Bragi 12
I, too, support the most ancient goddess of fertility and bearer of the ankh.