Today, my best friend had set me up on a blind date. The guy demonstrated at length that he could do different cartoon voices such as Donald Duck, Droopy and many others the entire time. Oh, and he also kept wanting to talk about his farts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a blind date. All my date would talk about was how he was 'really his own best friend'. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. When I got there, I found out that the guy was a ventriloquist and was going to use his puppet to talk to me. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. All my date would talk about was how he was "really his own best friend." FML
Today, I went on a blind date that my best friend had set up for me. When I arrived, I introduced myself and we sat at the table. After we ordered our food, he asked the waiter for some crayons and a kid's menu, and colored for the half hour before our food came. He didn't talk to me at all. FML
Today, my friend fixed me up with a guy from her workplace. I'm painfully shy, so I really appreciated it and was looking forward to meeting him, since she described him as very sweet. Once the date got started, he continuously made fun of my speech impediment, until I finally left in tears. FML
Today, my "friends" set me up on a blind date with a guy who according to their description, sounded perfect in just about every way. He turned out to be my obsessive ex, and this is their idea of a funny prank. FML
Today, I went on a blind date set up by my best friend. When I got there, my "date" was my ex. My best friend knew, and she thought it would be "funny" to see how we would react. FML
Today, I went on a blind double date with my friend. My date was actually blind. Not so bad, he seemed nice, until he told me I sound ugly and annoying. My friend laughed and agreed. FML
Today, I had a blind date that my friend set me up for. My date was the ugliest, most disgusting person you will ever meet, but I thought that I would give him a chance. He saw me, eyed me up and down, then said to my friend, "You're kidding, right?" FML
Today, my friend set me up on a blind date, to get my mind off having been recently broken up with. The guy was perfect: tall, muscular, handsome. But while we were watching a movie, I saw him dig around in his nose, then wipe his finger on my pants. FML
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Top comments
DrMonstar 0
Lol the cartoon voices would be pretty cool, but the fart talk is pretty gross.
DGross 8
I wonder if he was a smart fellow... ... and you were a fart smeller oh how I amuse myself at 3am
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Comments (86)
mrbuddy 0
Mel Blanc did that for a living. The voices, not the farts.
GiganTronic 0
You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?
darienlake 0
FARTS RULE!!
oneforme 0
you should tell him to lick your asshole then he will get all hot and as u start to enjoy it then let a huge fart out into his mouth
ColdGold 6
There you go . . .
DukeSkidmark 0
You are the coolest girl ever. I let out a fart about every two minutes my mom says I should see a doctor. Instead Im going to take classes on how to impersonate people with my farts then become a ventriloquist.
expen_dable 0
Hot girls talking about farts = acceptable, maybe cute fat girls talking about farts = vomit
LmFaO4realz 0
thts an interesting date
misskity6 0
don't be so ******* critical. he'll make the best kind of dad!!!
awesome1145 0
kool!!