Today, my best friend and I, after years of sexual tension, began to have sex for the first time. Things got heated and he decided to abruptly stand up with me around him. I got so nervous, spazzed out, and now have 37 staples in my head courtesy of his bookshelf. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Sexy!
Today, my fiancé and I attempted to have sex in my childhood bedroom. As we were falling onto the bed, I smacked my head on the wall, which caused a shelf of stuffed toys to fall onto the bed. Not only did it kill the mood, the shelf also hit me in the face. FML
It's just a flesh wound!
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML
Anemic performance
Today, we tried to have sex for the first time but I got so excited my blood pressure shot up and I got a nosebleed that didn't fully stop for nearly 30 minutes. Then when we tried again she accidentally headbutted me. The new bleeding still hasn't stopped and I'm feeling very lightheaded. FML
Oh yessss
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML
Today, me and my boyfriend were just about to have sex and I was so excited to do it just like the movies. He carried me up and just as he was about to lay me on the bed he sneezed, dropping me at the same time. I hit my head. Now I have 12 stitches where my eyebrow used to be. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML
Passionate
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate in an alley. He pushed me up against a wall and started kissing me, but he pushed me so hard I cut open my head and needed 10 stitches. FML
Heartless swine
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, I got up to get some water. When I stood up, I fell straight to the ground, my legs were so weak. As I fell, I hit my head on the end table and knocked myself unconscious. My boyfriend laughed at me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
Top comments
LostMy_Marbles 24
Rough sex, you're doing it wrong. Seriously though, hope you're ok!
junkman6 22
37 staples!? Jesus! I went through a windshield and didn't even need 37 staples! Well at least that sex war wound is cooler than run of the mill rug burn.
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Comments (75)
aantthhoonyy 6
Doesn't matter had sex.
NightHawk387 22
This kind of makes me think of the song 37 Stitches by Drowning Pool.
Levigasm 6
I don't believe you...
tumtum888 12
Must have been fun explaining that one to the emergency room doctor
katydid91 31
Damn.... Feel better OP!
itcomesinthrees 10
Aww that is pretty terrible, FYL. Hopefully you heal quick and maybe it will be the start of something wonderful! My husband was my best friend for a long time and that is how we ended up dating, minus the injury.
nikmiester 7
Rough without the perks
sem2183 13
And you panicked why???? Gees you'd think you never had any kind of rough or kinky sex before.
roxxyfoxxy3 25
Maybe after a while, you can try again! You know...without the bookcase.
FateIsBlissful 4
was it worth it? lol