Today, me and my boyfriend were just about to have sex and I was so excited to do it just like the movies. He carried me up and just as he was about to lay me on the bed he sneezed, dropping me at the same time. I hit my head. Now I have 12 stitches where my eyebrow used to be. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I sneezed so hard that my head shot forward and smashed against his, sending his head backwards against the wall. He ended up with a concussion, and I still feel like someone hit me over the head with a chair. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML
Today, I ran up to my boyfriend to kiss him when he got home from work. I tripped and I fell on him, and he fell backwards. He ended up hitting his head on the sidewalk and had to get stitches. He also had a concussion. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and he slid his hand up near my face too fast and ended up clocking me in the nose. It is the first time that I've ever had nosebleed while orgasming. FML
Today, when my boyfriend was about to orgasm, I suddenly sneezed all over his face. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He was about to make me come so I lifted my arm above my head with pleasure. I accidently punched him in the eye, hard enough that he had to stop for a while because he said he felt dizzy. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. It was going well until our braces got caught. Out of pain, I tried to pull away, which made my eyes water. Then I sneezed in his mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided it would be fun to sit on my lap. In the process he landed on me so hard that he made me hit my head. Then when he turned around his elbow smacked into my nose causing it to break. FML
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Top comments
alex_vik 1
lol, I can't imagine you're too old, since you said "sex just like in the movies".
Ldy_S_FTW 0
...at least he didn't sneeze while he was giving ***********? i imagine that woulda been quite painful. =/
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Comments (51)
Ldy_S_FTW 0
...at least he didn't sneeze while he was giving ***********? i imagine that woulda been quite painful. =/
Lolocaust 0
"so you want to [make] love just like the movies... but in the movies, they're not in love at all." Looolz
alex_vik 1
lol, I can't imagine you're too old, since you said "sex just like in the movies".
newb_01 0
if you're young enough to think that you're going to have "just like in the movies" you're too young to be having sex. don't turn out to be one of those pre-teen *****
ohhboyy 0
#1 i dont know what that means =/
KeScoBo 0
Maybe you should take it as a compliment, apparently a significant number of people sneeze in response to sexual thoughts (I just read this like 2 min ago). http://www.mindhacks.com/blog/2009/03/when_i_get_that_feel.html
Ldy_S_FTW 0
#5 ... *********** is the female equivalent of gettin a ******* for a male. get it?
pmole42088 0
ya i have to agree with #3, and maybe him dropping u is god slapping you in the face for going to have sex when ur prob 13 or younger.
alex_vik 1
#5 - '*********** is the act of using the mouth, lips, and tongue to stimulate the female genitals.'
RPGod 0
ooohhh... I hope you were able to explain this one.