vaalcrawford
Canada
Today, I puked up a centipede. FML
LostMy_Marbles
Mrs Bundaberg, AU 32 years-old In a relationship
Anonymous
United States
Today, I covered a 10-hour shift for a sick coworker. Glad to earn some extra money for the holidays, I went to clock out. I hadn't even clocked in when I first got there at 7 am. FML
notamum
Belmont, Australia
Today, I was babysitting my 4-month-old niece at the park, when a woman came up to me and said, "Don't worry, dear. You'll get your figure back soon." FML
themonesterman
Brooklyn, United States
Today, my grandmother is coming over to my family's house to stay for about a week or so. Apparently, the guest room window isn't big enough for her dream catcher, so she wants her cat to sleep in the guest room and she wants to sleep in my room. My parents support this. FML
oncehipjr
Dallas, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out I'm allergic to condoms. Which would be great if my girlfriend wasn't allergic to birth control. FML