Today, my apartment has been echoing all day with the wails of my cat, Butters. He's yet again managed to trap himself in the umbrella stand. In the past, he has eventually gotten himself out, but this time I think I might have to use a hacksaw. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML
Today, I thought I heard a nasty storm brewing, even though there was no warning that one would occur. I then realized it was one of my cats, stuck behind a chair and trying to escape with little success. Yes, her escape attempts were that noisy. FML
Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML
Today, I got home from a long day at work, hoping to just fix dinner and relax, only to find that my cat had come into the house with a rabbit, and is now stuck underneath the cabinet. FML
Today, my cat fell into the toilet, and I had to save him. I now have a soggy cat and scratched arms. FML
Today, my cat managed to lock my dad and me outside of our house. FML
Today, my cat somehow managed to lock me out of my apartment by jumping on the doorknob while I was taking the trash out. I had to call a locksmith, and now it's like my cat won't even come near at me, like I betrayed him for allowing a stranger into our home. FML
Today, my cat tried to look outside the window in my room by climbing on top of the air conditioner. It's already rather flimsy, as she had broken the accordions with her clumsiness last year. But this time, she somehow managed to make the AC fall out of the window, and she followed along with it. FML
Today, I closed my bedroom door before I went to work this morning so my cat wouldn't chew on the cords in there. When I got back, I couldn't find my other cat anywhere. I went to my bedroom and heard her yelling. She was in there, stuck there all morning and afternoon. Oops. FML
Today, my cat got his head stuck in the handle of a plastic bag while snooping. Unfortunately, it was the bag I use to put his turds in after scooping them from the litter tray. With the bag trapped around his neck, he got spooked, then ran around the house, spreading turds from the bag as he fled. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
zombicidal 11
everyone knows its butters "that's me"
stevenJB 25
Lol. All i see is the irony of his cat named "butters" is stuck and can't get free. :3 obvious I know, but i felt like pointing it out.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (210)
kippyco 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
It's your own fault for naming him butters.
stevenJB 25
Lol. All i see is the irony of his cat named "butters" is stuck and can't get free. :3 obvious I know, but i felt like pointing it out.
biggestfan23 11
Dogs are better
_ebbonyy 11
I'm pretty sure that every cat is curious enough to get themselves in a situation like this, regardless of their name. I think it's kind of cute :)
gurly98 13
15- agreed
eeppiicc 8
You have cat to be kitten me that's quite a cat-astrophy.
Trisha_aus 15
Why is it when there's an Fml about a cat the cat haters come and say "dogs are better"..cats are equally awesome..especially one named Professor Meowington
Shrike 24
I agree. Cats vs dogs comments? What are you, 8 years old, or just moronic trolls?
justmethough 8
Your cat has been trapped and wailing all day and you haven't tried helping him? Wtf is wrong with you?
truth_spitta 0
Dam 28 beat me too it!! But it's terrrrrrrrible it's purrrrty sad to hear but I guess cat-astorphies(spell?) happen everyday and it's nothing to meow about
biggestfan23 11
#34,37 shut up. all I'm doing is stating my opinion
Shrike 24
And all I'm doing is stating my opinion that you're a ******* idiot. Telling me to shut up is kinda hypocritical, don't you think, junior?
biggestfan23 11
Haha junior... Don't worry I won't step down to your level
NoisyNykkii 10
16- e_e I have no problem with your comment... All I must say is... PUT ON A SHIRT(and stop wearing push ups)!
StoryOfTheYear 15
65- All they're doing is voicing their opinion about your opinion. How can you advocate freedom of speech by telling the other person to shut up?
truth_spitta 0
Touché 77, touché.....
rdrr 2
Dogs are better.
ManInTheMachine 20
rdrr: That's your opinion. And while you're entitled to it, it doesn't make it a fact. Honestly, an argument just finished about opinions, and now you're trying to start another one? For shame. Everyone ignore the troll. Move on with your days. Or evening, depending on your locations.
caplox 6
Maybe OP didn't know their cat was stuck.
Amethyst888 14
112- Of course how could OP possibly know? Butters was only wailing all day, but you know sometimes a cat's agonizingly loud wails and their echoes just aren't loud enough.
mickatopolis 2
Haha true
KeyboardWarrior 10
28, That cat-astrophe pun is getting as old as the 'situation' jokes. No offense to you personally, but that pun is used on every single FML involving felines. Get original.
NoisyButters 7
Butters is an awesome name! ._.
bwtchinheels 0
Ba-doom-sissss
bwtchinheels 0
Exactly, people r such bitches. You are untitled to an opinion and they don't have to freak out about it.
bwtchinheels 0
I think he was joking dumb-ass.
Torien 2
This may well be my favourite FML.
zombicidal 11
everyone knows its butters "that's me"
ttttttyyy 0
TIMMY!
speshlk37 13
Awww, hamburgers...
xoconnie 8
Stupid cat.
Tommay186 7
Beat me to it
speshlk37 13
Same here, 78. Had to settle for hamburgers.
teddy4nyy 13
It's fine as long as the umbrella stand isn't sticky.
kamakazi1 5
BUTTERS! You're grounded, mister! Or, of course; Nyooo kitteh that's mah umbrella stand! Bad kitteh!
rdrr 2
No kittah! Mash, kittah is being an asshole!
TheBonzaiGirl 0
If you name your cat after an odd young man, don't be too surprised when it turns out to be an odd young cat.
AntonioMontana 0
mash?
TheDrudgeChild 4
Is it sad that I ended up reading the FML and the comments in my head with Butters voice?
Krysk_fml 0
Isn't Butters that blonde kid from South Park?
NoisyButters 7
Loo loo loo, I got some apples c:
AbbyAbyss 5
Aw... I hope he doesn't get hurt!
onlychildFTW 34
I think your cat has gotten fatter. And that's why he is now trapped. To much butter for butters.
Akumie 6
Same here D: (Love your icon by the way c: )
citymayer 7
And now we'll never know if Butters ever got out!
Wdgames 0
Abyss abyss, your picture makes me smile smile smile.
Inediblepeaches 15
Pony lovers everywhere... I feel at home :3 /)*(
ArielTheMermaid 17
3 I like your picture :) brohoof /)*(
AbbyAbyss 5
I'm feeling really loved right now. Brohoof's for everypony! /)
gurly98 13
Poor kitty
SqueakyChipmunk 22
My cat got his head stuck under the door once. All he had to do was turn his head, but nooo he had to wait till I try to help him to scratch me to death and run away.
iahntajonera 3
At first I thought he was gonna use the hacksaw on the kitty too.
kiran_fml 5
If he's done it before you should just get rid of the umbrella stand, or hide it
ttttttyyy 0
Or put some umbrellas in it...
llamafish 25
Who the hell put umbrellas in an umbrella stand?
truth_spitta 0
Hate to break it to you 6, but there is no such thing as hiding something from a cat
kiran_fml 5
I figure it would be like baby-proofing a house, except it would be cat-proofing. But then again I have neither a cat or baby so im not sure how effective it would be
bertman21 5
Maybe you should butter him up and get him out.
Ilikeurfmls 13
Once my aunt's cat got stuck in a hole in her fridge and froze and died. I think you should get help getting him out.
BIGBOY4rmAHM 19
I feel sorry for your aunt, but her cat dying has nothing to do with this FML.
citymayer 7
You can't freeze in an umbrella stand.
TarieBoo 2
daaaamn that cat must've been in there forever.....?
Ilikeurfmls 13
It had to do with cats getting stuck in things...
TheBonzaiGirl 0
It can if it's one of those new-fangled refrigerated umbrella stands.
Il_Maestro 6
I hate when my cat freezes to death in an umbrella stand. Also, why the hell was there a hole in your aunt's fridge?
SqueakyChipmunk 22
...Buzz Killington strikes again.
kakarot2 11
I can't believe it is in fact butter this time...
Samiyah_fml 2
The irony of the name!
cookeemonster 7
I know how you feel. My cat cries whenever the dog barks at him, which doesn't help because his favourite spot to sleep is the dog Kennal. 5am. Everyday.
Suks2beeme 7
What the hell is your post even about? Shut up
therealslim 15
Alright 142, no need to be a dick head
RadioOctopus 16
Fyl