Today, my apartment has been echoing all day with the wails of my cat, Butters. He's yet again managed to trap himself in the umbrella stand. In the past, he has eventually gotten himself out, but this time I think I might have to use a hacksaw. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML
Today, I thought I heard a nasty storm brewing, even though there was no warning that one would occur. I then realized it was one of my cats, stuck behind a chair and trying to escape with little success. Yes, her escape attempts were that noisy. FML
Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML
Today, I got home from a long day at work, hoping to just fix dinner and relax, only to find that my cat had come into the house with a rabbit, and is now stuck underneath the cabinet. FML
Today, my cat fell into the toilet, and I had to save him. I now have a soggy cat and scratched arms. FML
Today, my cat managed to lock my dad and me outside of our house. FML
Today, my cat somehow managed to lock me out of my apartment by jumping on the doorknob while I was taking the trash out. I had to call a locksmith, and now it's like my cat won't even come near at me, like I betrayed him for allowing a stranger into our home. FML
Today, my cat tried to look outside the window in my room by climbing on top of the air conditioner. It's already rather flimsy, as she had broken the accordions with her clumsiness last year. But this time, she somehow managed to make the AC fall out of the window, and she followed along with it. FML
Today, I closed my bedroom door before I went to work this morning so my cat wouldn't chew on the cords in there. When I got back, I couldn't find my other cat anywhere. I went to my bedroom and heard her yelling. She was in there, stuck there all morning and afternoon. Oops. FML
Today, my cat got his head stuck in the handle of a plastic bag while snooping. Unfortunately, it was the bag I use to put his turds in after scooping them from the litter tray. With the bag trapped around his neck, he got spooked, then ran around the house, spreading turds from the bag as he fled. FML
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Top comments
zombicidal 11
everyone knows its butters "that's me"
stevenJB 25
Lol. All i see is the irony of his cat named "butters" is stuck and can't get free. :3 obvious I know, but i felt like pointing it out.
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Comments (210)
yumgranolabar 5
Cats: mystical creatures that are always able to find the most awkward place to sit.
RussianFox 13
We can't help our natural curiosity.
redbluegreen 41
Successfully buttering your cat is hard work.
SkoomaKi 28
Okay so if we use butter to get butters out of the stand, butter will require cleaning, but also the butter will have to be cleaned. If they don't have any butter to free butter how will they get butter out?
weepingangel_fml 7
Who puts an umbrella stand INSIDE an apartment?
gurly98 13
EVERYONE
redbluegreen 41
Someone who doesn't want it stolen?
I_Punch_Babies 7
...or wet
killaKT 2
Haha this is what I was thinking!
AwsumShyGuy 12
can i haz freedom?
gurly98 13
Can u spellz da words rite? Seriously! Learn your grammar! Or I'll kill you >:-)
SqueakyChipmunk 22
What's wrong with you?!? Have you ever heard of lol cats? I can haz cheezburger? I haz a bucket? Your ignorance of the internets displeases me.
Mariebaz 11
Can I haz another thumb down for 39?
Yetifoot 0
Aw cheezburgers... :-)
Palirose 22
18- please don't make any more butter jokes. I can feel it clogging my arteries as we speak.
jem7vwh 1
Curiosity killed the cat!
superswagbro 7
I thought it salted the snail. ... I watch too much spongebob.
meihua 19
And satisfaction brought it back(:
SkoomaKi 28
butters could slip because of too much butter, but how much butter would we need to get butters free? Anyways butters could land the fall but the butter could cause butter's paws to slip and cause him to fall. So maybe butter isn't a good choice for getting butters out. I think it's fair to say I'm buttered out.
CsHx 16
Yeah but won't the butter just make him slip back down..
puppytaco64 8
Aww cheeseburgers
lacrossebrah13 8
......
puppytaco64 8
I'm assuming you don't see the south park reference
Rowdey 10
Hamburgers*
puppytaco64 8
I thought he says cheeseburgers in the episode with Biggy Smalls