Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my cock over my jeans and said, "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML
Today, as I was about to meet my girlfriend's parents, she thought it would be funny to grab my junk and give me a hard-on right before they walked in. I couldn't hide it quickly enough. FML
Today, I was hugging my girlfriend after she had a really bad day at work, when she burst into tears and started sobbing. For some reason that I'll never understand, it gave me a hard-on. She felt it, and now she thinks I'm a sick bastard. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML
Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found me later, in her room, with my head between her thighs. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. My phone started ringing and it was my Mom, she said I could answer it. As I answered the phone my girlfriend started playing with my dick. I moaned. Loud. FML
Today, I had my girlfriend over and we were hugging when she put her feet on my feet. We started walking around like that and I said, "This is hard to maintain." She replied with "So's your erection." FML
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, I started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection, all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML
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Top comments
fatfaceunited 0
How do you forget you have a boner? Generally they're pretty apparent. Unless you have a small dick in which case the mom probably didn't feel it
warmvanillasugar 0
A congrats hug for what?
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Comments (142)
1221121 0
Congrats for getting a hand job in the car.....?
Jimboom 12
Forget forgetting it, you would have felt it dammit! Unless your completely devoid of nerves down there... or have been wanking like a safari park chimp that day. So... did she like it? ;-)
Jaywin 3
Did you really get that excited to see the mom that you forgot you had a boner? If that's the case, I'm sure hugging her would've given you a boner anyway.
Silent_Harmony 3
Ya what #3 said
slutsstud 0
YDI dumbass.. Why didn't u make ur gf give u full handjob before going in??.... dumbasses!.. I bet ur gf was like, "I'll make you cum once we get home." RIght? God, I hate procrastinators! They disgust me!
KatherineAnne 7
I tease my bf all the time... It's really freaking fun haha so this I understand.
mojo5678 5
I bet that you were like "this is a clever and funny response. People will like me if I post it." no, we don't.
Peroxide 3
Nice of her mum to congratulate u on getting a hand job. bl on the pin dick
lilbigman 0
Go on #12. Quote of the day there
Octiskeet 0
#15- Because you're puny men and you can't "make" us do anything. :D On a serious note, sometimes we don't want to go the full mile, we just want to get you a little excited. We are not cum machines, and therefore have no obligation to follow through. If you think this mentality is unfair, perhaps I should point out you do that to us ALL THE TIME.
KatherineAnne 7
True that. It's hilarious to get a guy hard when there is nothing they can do but hide it hehe
sheheartsthings 0
"Give me a congrats hug because your daughter finally touched my penis!!"
plexico 4
How do you forget an erection? Is your girlfriend's mom a MILF? When I go to hug my mother-in-law (that's what your girlfriend's mom becomes -- deal with it), I don't press my gentials against her. I could hug her even if her daughter had been giving me a ******** a few minutes earlier, and she wouldn't be the wiser. Of course, she might notice my expression that says, "Get the **** out of here! Couldn't you have come a few minutes later, so I could!?"