bad luck?
Australia
Today, it was my first day being a full-time paramedic. I was shot in the arm. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Trigger happy
Today, I was shot and arrested for trespassing. I'm a firefighter and I was saving a child. FML
Anonymous
Work until you drop dead
Today, my ex shot me. Actually shot me. After I woke up from surgery, I told my manager I would obviously need sick leave. She told me she was shot in the army, and got over it because she’s "not a pussy", so she expects me back at work, recovering from a gunshot to the chest, by Tuesday. FML
AtLeastThereWasAParamedic
Today, I was walking on the sidewalk near my house when a car pulled out of a parking spot in front of a speeding ambulance. The ambulance swerved up onto the grass. Yes, I broke my arm after being hit by an ambulance. FML
Jim
Today, I was walking to the bus for my first day at my new school. I tripped in the darkness and split my chin open and broke my arm. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
Detroit, United States
The first day of the rest of your life (or not)
Today, it was my first day at my new job at a nursing home. Not only were we short staffed, two residents passed away, and I got beaten up by an old man. FML
Anonymous
The precious truck
Today, I got fired because, while responding to an emergency page for the volunteer fire department to help find a man in a field with a gunshot wound, I backed into a rock with the company truck that I drive to and from work. Nobody asked about the guy with the bullet inside him. He's OK now, in case anyone cares. FML
BOHICA123
Brighton, United States
Today, being so desperate for money, I accepted a job in which I get shot at with paintballs for six hours. FML
guessimdead
United States
Kids…
Today, I went to my new job at a pre-school. I was really excited because everything was going so well, and a little boy even said he was drawing a picture of me. He even gave it to me when he was finished. Well it was me, but I was also on fire and being stabbed and shot multiple times. FML
red_headforlife
Chandler, United States
Today, I was so happy to be leaving the hospital after breaking my arm the night before. Just as I walked out of the doors, a huge ambulance team was running in at the same time, and knocked me down full force. I now have a broken ankle. FML
Anonymous
Unstable
Today, it was my first day out of hospital and being able to walk outside. I went to a shop and an old lady backed up into me and elbowed the exact stop on my back the pain starts from. I hit the floor like a ton of bricks and had to go back to hospital. FML
Top comments
lifesucks1234567_fml 2
**** you for trying to be funny.
MrsDepp 12
Except it's 000 in Australia
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Comments (229)
SanaHasSwag 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
0: omg is the gun okay?!
lifesucks1234567_fml 2
**** you for trying to be funny.
farnsworth 3
No it died
xShannonxSammyx 7
Yeah, guns are wounded when they do the thing they were built to do...
KriiFahMoro 9
Trying to be funny fail
chane1100 6
All of your comments suck.
1waytoolive 1
2- DUCKFACE KILL IT WIT FIRE!!!!
linkinpark98 24
Fail. Just... No.
risalucky13 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
U have no ******* idea how or what it feels like to lose/ save lives. U tell me how u would feel if u see someone die in ur hands while u cut them out a car cuz they r pinned and they are bleeding to death becuz of some asshole drunk driver T-bone her car so bad that her arm was hanging off her over on a guard rail. It was mid summer day and she had her window down. Tell me how u feel it's not a easy job I rather have gotten shot and lived. Then to have someone die. U ******* asshole.
EvilLilCupcake 10
What brought that up 144? No one said it wasn't horrible or tragic....... Why are you flipping out though??
EvilLilCupcake 10
Ph an 144 also don't assume people don't know what it's like to watch something like that. I've seen shit too. I've watched my best friend slit her arm open because her father molested her and her mom beat her and I couldn't do shit about it. Just because you've seen something horrible doesn't mean you have the right to flip a bitch at random people who you don't know. You have no ******* idea what any of us have seen...
CabbageTrees 13
@144 - Cool story, bro. Tell it again!
2tone2bone 3
Wow you think you the only person to see bad shit happen?! I've had friends get shot in the back of the head while I'm standing right next to them. Just be GLAD AND LUCKY that you are alive. We see people being shot or killed almost every week out here in L.A.
TheFakeAsian 0
Dickhole.
njgohard 16
******* cuntflap.
walshboy 0
lol
MrsDepp 12
Except it's 000 in Australia
GSP101 0
You LUCKY bastard. It was your arm.
TheDrudgeChild 4
True, getting shot in ANYWHERE but a vital organ is lucky if a gun is around. Still sucks though.
Ololo_fml 16
He used to b a paramedic until he got an arrow in the knee
RussianFox 13
Be* also arrow to the knee jokes are overused.
manlikebanana 0
#24. I think #4 was meaning that he got a nice battle wound to show off and it really didn't hurt him really bad. Still, getting shot sucks no matter where it is.
EvilLilCupcake 10
#45 I think you read into #4's comment a little to much...
SPAIDZ 0
No no. I agree. My first thought when I read this comment was that's awesome. I want to get shot in the arm.
FinnishAmerican 3
Hahaha
marianne1985 3
Call 9-1-1 oh shoot you are 9-1-1 lol... Just kidding man that sucks
bingababe 16
Except here in Australia it's 000
EricaCookies 0
And 999 in England.
AddeU 0
Just a general tip when commenting on FMLs, stick to one topic, i.e don't jump from trolling the OP to feeling sorry for him, the other users usually don't appreciate that.
captainsuperdawg 0
I thought they changed it. I already memorized the jingle! 01189998819991197253
silver848 6
In Australia you don't save man shot with gun as paramedic, you are man shot with gun!
TrimKibbles 12
captainsuperdawg, you made my day.
swiftslayer77 1
Best show ever Maybe op should have sent an email hahaha
harshpatel009 4
That sucks... No more paramedic I'm guessin
GrammarNazzzzzi 6
Comment Moderated by SOPA
The_Instigator 11
You should have shot him with your syringes.
Phyre24 17
"Stay back! I have... *looks over* needles!" The guy screams like a little girl and runs. Oh needles, why art thou so terrifying?
yummcookie 0
Übercharge ready!
CryMoreFMLs 15
85 - Now doktor! Hit charge!
020266t 5
Hahaha, is that a TF2 reference?
loller27 6
gosh FYL
that_1_guy069 0
well you know what to do...get to work jk that sucks man
drooby 5
At least u was prepared
ryukk_fml 3
u was?..
tylersign 11
At least u is unprepared to use correct grammar..
GrammarNazzzzzi 6
People like 13 really grind my gears...why do these people say "you is" or "I is"? It doesn't sound as cool as you think. F***ing dumb people!
you_failed 15
Word dawg.
Akharr01 5
I could hear someone say that Ina country accent
Sl1mShad3y 10
I heard a ghetto accent...