Today, it was my birthday. The only call I received was from my stalker, who sang happy birthday with a japanese accent and asked if he could be my "special present". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it was my birthday. The only person that remembered was my creepy stalker. FML
Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I got just three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office, to sing me a happy birthday. FML
Today, the only person who remembered my birthday was my stalker ex. He left condoms, birth control, furry handcuffs, and a lingerie set in my mailbox, with a note saying to prepare for our anniversary. We went out for a week. In sixth grade. FML
Today, the only person to wish me a Happy Valentine's day was a wrong number calling my cell phone. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I got a phone call from my high school bully, to remind me that he'll always be able to find me and do whatever he wants to me. He does this every year. I turn 34 today. FML
Today, I was so lonely I called my stalker ex-boyfriend. He was too busy to talk. FML
Today, I was at a job interview when my phone started ringing. It was my mom, so I quickly hit "Ignore", which was probably for the best since she was obviously drunk. She left a voicemail in which she sang "Happy Birthday" to me. It's not my birthday. FML
Today, the only "Happy birthday!" I got was from the cake I bought for myself. FML
Today, it was my birthday. I got ONE birthday greeting: from my bank, telling me they were closing my account. FML
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Top comments
crackberrie 0
creepy!!! how come you haven't changed your number? (it sounds like this person has been stalking you for a while from your post)
teehee520 0
Creepy... Happy birthday tho!
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Comments (90)
IAmAJellyDonut 0
FYL! Happy belated birthday, though. Yeah, I'd definitely say change your number.
A_Lee_Is_Betta 0
Yeah, I was Moderating the FMLs and the stalker guy wrote about the FML she worte. Wow. 2 sides of a story, never fails.
abcdefghijk12345_fml_fml 0
what did he say?
A_Lee_Is_Betta 0
He said that he was her friend and did what it says, but not the special present part. But, he obvoiusly goes to this site.
WhiteX 0
Dam* he even stalks her on FML. Poor OP, late happy birthday to you!
Rydizzle 0
well Happy late BIrthday. hahahha htats hillarious tho. did you stay on the phone to hear him sing the wholee song.
musicismyhotSEX 0
HappyBirthday! and the only thing i got for my birthday was watching aristocats on my friends couch!
CynicComedian 2
That sucks! Even my birthday was better than that!
misty_donna 0
what does moderating mean? :P
Funky_T 0
HAPPY BIRTHDAYYY TOW YOWWW.......KONICHIWA AND **** YOWWWW
alkaline_cyanide 0
*sings* i wanna marry my stalker thats what this reminds me of haha. did it make you feel loved?
plasticballoon 0
hahaha lol
Brey1013 0
Happy Birthday +10 cool points to ur stalker