Today, it was easter and I thought it might be fun to look for eggs with my little brother. My parents told me to take the ones in the higher places that my brother couldn't reach. All of his eggs were filled with candy or money. Each one of mine had a note saying 'maybe when you lose weight'. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had an Easter Egg Hunt in my backyard for my kids. When they collected all the eggs, they opened them and to their dismay there was no candy inside. When I bought them, I thought they already came with candy. It’s been two hours and my kids won’t stop crying. FML
Today, for Easter, my brother and sister both got $200 gifts from my parents. I got a chocolate egg. I'm allergic to chocolate. FML
Today, my parents told me that I will grow up to be a criminal, living on the streets, on drugs. All this because I took the last chocolate egg. FML
Today, while at work at my grocery store I sold a TON of eggs to a bunch of kids. We joked around that they were "going to bake a giant cake." When I got home I found out someone had egged my house. FML
Today, I woke up and decided to make my mom a special Easter breakfast in bed. I pre-heated the oven to bake the sausage just the way she likes. Guess where my easter basket was. FML
Today, during an Easter egg hunt, I found divorce papers. FML
Today, it's Easter Sunday and from what I can hear, my neighbors invented a very special kind of Easter egg hunt. Maybe they hid them in the walls and furniture? Because getting at them sure seems to involve power tools. FML
Today, I discovered a drawer full of chocolates, cookies and baked goods in my house. When I asked my sister what the drawer was, she told me that my mom thought it would be a good idea to hide the fattening foods from me. My entire family had known about the food drawer, except me. FML
Today, it is both my birthday and Easter. My whole family came into town and my mom made a big dinner with all of my favorite foods. After church, I took a nap. When I woke up, all the food, including my cake, was gone. No one thought to wake me up. FML
Today, I decided to go on a diet to lose some weight before summer. This was followed by the arrival of a giant parcel full of candy from my mother. FML
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Top comments
Aera_fml 0
Wow. Next holiday (maybe Christmas) give your mom a note in a Tiffany's box that says, "Maybe when you pull that pine cone out of your ass" and give your dad the same note in an equally exciting box.
cyxx 0
Ouch, that's mean ... They could have just filled your eggs with money instead of candy, which would've been a subtle hint. That was harsh.
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Comments (140)
mobius8 0
Aw my friends family says stuff like that to her, and she's only a little over weight. She plays a lot of sports, and eats well, but is still a little chubby, and they hide the chocolate in the house from her and stuff. Really damaging to kids self esteem.
im_bored 0
LOL @ #9....that's still pretty crappy of them!
Ric3ball 0
maybe you should..
beg2dream 0
after reading posts like this, I don't think my crazy ass bitch of mum was as bad as I thought. While she would scream at the store that I was too fat to fit in the jeans, seemed bad, this would have been far worse!
tiltwrestler 0
Dude You're fat and older And you're out searching for easter eggs.... YDI
lowcapacityx 0
Aha! Encouragement by the egg.
Vincenzo_fml 1
Consider going to a doctor, get tested to see your percentage of body fat. Don't just use that BMI horse shit, it doesn't account for muscle being heavier than fat, get a real test. If you're at an unhealthy amount, get to work and lose it, even if you don't feel anything now, you'll know about it later with the higher risk of heart disease later. You'll also feel better about yourself, not saying you feel bad about yourself now, but there's always room to feel better about yourself.
teh_ass 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You should lose weight then! Stop being such an eyesore.
_comic_ 0
26... none of those have anything to do with searching for eggs! It is easter. We still have easter egg hunts, and all my siblings are over 17 :P
TryToBeKind 0
That would be child abuse on their part - or adult-abuse if you're an adult. If you're their dependent, it's their responsibility to keep healthy foods in the house and their responsibility to make sure you get exercise so they are responsible in part. Weight loss tips I used for my 12-year-old stepdaughter: a) we got the school to enroll her in a second gym class and let us know if she wasn't participating in it (she used to be the type that walke daway from the ball when it flew toward her and did not make an effort to catch/hit anything). b) we ensured that her cafeteria card would not allow her to buy extras at lunch time c) we all took an ettiquite class together (This entails setting the fork down between bites and taking smaller bites) d) we enrolled in cooking classes together so she could learn to cook healthy meals If you can't afford those things, I'm sure you'll find videos on youtube or even just recipes online. I wish you good luck with that, it sucks to have people be mean about weight loss since some people just struggle with it and no one is perfect.