Today, it's my 26th birthday. My girlfriend gave me a matchbox car, a glow necklace, and a squirt gun. For her birthday, I bought her a new dress, rented a limo, and took her around to bar hop with her friends. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Simp
Today, it was the girl of my dreams' birthday. She already knows I am totally in love with her. So for her birthday I decided to buy her a $60 dollar bottle of rum for her and her friends to have fun with. She picked it up from my house with her new boyfriend waiting in the car. FML
Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML
How can I make this about me?
Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML
Today, it's my sixteenth birthday and my mom promised me she'd buy me a car. She came home with a toy lego car. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My fiancé decided to give me the gift of "freedom." That's how he put it, anyway. FML
Best birthday ever!
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had promised that the day would belong to me. But no, I had to drive 80km forth and back to pick him up from work, then he took pictures with his new camera lens, then he decided what to eat, demanded a massage, and then he just fell asleep. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, it's my 17th birthday. I asked for a newer car because my car right now sucks. I got a book on photography. I don't own a camera. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me a Paul Frank t-shirt. It says "I'm single." FML
Top comments
SAgirl 23
You're her sugar daddy, not her BF.
kman1759 7
if this was flipped and the boy was given the squirt gun and the girl was giving the limo everyones opinions would be completely different.
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Comments (164)
Michigan_Girl 0
Well, on the plus side you now know what NOT to get her for her birthday next year.
underyourbreath 8
While those gifts are a little silly, guys are really hard to buy presents for!! =( While I can't speak for you, all my recent bf's haven't been interested in sports - so that's out. Again, I can't speak for you, but my guys have also gone already full force buying everything that's interested them.. so I can't buy him that new video game, get him that cool music equipment, etc. And google is just no help at all!! One of the first things that pops up (that's not sports) is a money clip... WTF?!? Nothing says I love you like a money clip (sarcasm). Or a shave kit?! That says you've just run out of ideas. Also, most guys don't really respond to cheesy stuff. I mean, there's about 1.3 seconds of 'awww' (probably for pity) and then they're over it and never look at it again. Really, all that's left for a girl to get her guy is a sexy outfit for herself.. a gift that just keeps on giving : )
alexFYL 11
I agree, buying stuff for guys is hard. Getting them a wallet, shave kit, etc... is about as much of a cop out as buying flowers, lotion, soaps or candles for women. LAME! Like you said, most men I know typically buy whatever they want when they want it - video games, movies, computer stuff. Stuff they don't buy, are usually out of their price range and therefore out of my price range. Unfortunately I'm the same way, I'm a woman and also hard to buy for. I don't like flowers, lotions, jewelry... they are very nice gestures, don't get me wrong, but for the most part they are useless. I am allergic to nickel which is in a lot of jewelry, flowers die, and I already have enough lotion stockpiled from well-meaning gifts to last me at least four years. I also download or buy any video games I'm interested in, I don't like reruns so once I watch a movie, I will never watch it again - so buying a DVD is out. Dresses and shoes are awesome, but it's hard to shop for clothes for someone if you don't know their style, preferences or fit. Goes both ways for men or women. Gift cards are nice but impersonal. What it comes down to, if you don't want to spend a lot of money (all that's left that I want is furniture, and I mean, how lame would it sound to buy furniture as a gift? Not to mention expensive. I also want a new camera, again, expensive.) is that a night out on the town or dinner is probably the best bet. Having a wishlist or telling your partner what you want (don't be afraid to ask!) is alwyas the best bet. Make sure you offer several suggestions in different price ranges. Last but not least, a gift is a gift. It is not required. Do not expect one, and be thankful for what you get.
annasakki 0
number 1 ur pussy whipped, clearly she doesn't feel the same way about u
kalliomgbbq 0
that's pretty much amazing.
papaya_master 4
lol sucks to be you mate! Happy birthday anyway XD
ThreeSheetsGone 12
She thinks you're a kid, which is obviously brought on by your behavior. Dump your girlfriend and find someone who thinks dick, fart, and ass jokes are still funny. You'll be golden.
skyeyez9 25
I like going out and doing fun things for special occasions. I live in CO, so we get together and go snowboarding, ride our snowmobiles in Gunnison national forrest. Summer: white water rafting, midnight hikes...etc
madleafsfan 0
Join the club get her an iPod touch I get a towel and then she says were over
43bubba34 25
Dude, don't you get it she's dropping hint about what she has planned. "Glow necklace" means you're going to a rave. "matchbox car", and "squirt gun" means she wants you **** her in the car and "super soak" her. Duh!!!
sngbbi 0
next.