Today, it's my 18th birthday. I called my parents and they told me that they found weed in the guest house, so they called my boarding school to drug test me. It wasn't my weed. They didn't even say, "Happy Birthday." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Today, I found out that the only reason my parents have been letting me hang out with my friends so late is so they can search my room for drugs. FML
Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML
Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML
Today, I called the campus police "anonymously" while my roommate was away and told them about her weed stash because I was tired of her smoking in our room all the time. She had taken her weed to a friend's and got off scot-free. I have a hearing Monday for the Adderall they found in my desk. FML
Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML
Today, after arriving, I was told that there will be mandatory drug tests for everybody at my work. Yesterday, I did joints at a friend's party, as it was her birthday. I'm fucked. FML
Today, my mother went through my bag and found what she thought was rolling papers. I was yelled at and called a stupid pothead with no future. They were facial blotting papers. FML
Today, my 15 year-old sister came home at 4 a.m. totally stoned. My parents treated her really nicely and woke me up. I'm now grounded until I go college for being a bad influence. I volunteer at schools to talk about drug abuse. FML
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Top comments
DeeJayD 0
Wait a minute. You're at boarding school. It was in the guest house. What's wrong with this picture? Your parents are either just assholes, or phenomenally stupid.
dudewithface 0
happy birthday :)
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Comments (92)
EH_123 0
same thing happened to me on my 16th! except it was mine >.>
elliex3 0
hey 63- at least i know how to spell "higher" :D
carmel 0
Well that sucks....... Happy Birthday anyway! :) Whose weed was it?
carmel 0
Well that sucks..... Happy Birthday anyway! B+C=P (turn your head on the side, it's a little man. B are shoes, + is his body, C is his smile, = are his eyes and P is his cap) :D Whose weed was it? .......sorry, i posted that twice accidentally.
applejacks 0
just because you go to boarding school and have a guest house doesnt mean you are rich so stop assuming things and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
yesbutnotyou 0
that sucks, but at least it wasn't yours. hopefully your birthday got better.
rakhil11 7
#41 is such an idiot HAPPY B-DAY!!! I FEEL SO SORRY 4 U!!! take a drug test 2 prove ur parents wrong, then remind them that it was ur b-day 2morrow. this is coming from a low-income household. and, if ur boarding school is the good kind, i'm happy 4 u 4 bing able 2 go there. unlike some asses on here.
mfylife123 0
i really hope #41 is joking....
funnyyy 0
what ******* assholes why would they ever get you drug tested by your school
klpryde 0
FYL for being in a boarding school. FYL for Having to call your parents on your bday before they called you. And FYL for not scoring that weed. :(