Legalize it
Today, after arriving, I was told that there will be mandatory drug tests for everybody at my work. Yesterday, I did joints at a friend's party, as it was her birthday. I'm fucked. FML
Today, after arriving, I was told that there will be mandatory drug tests for everybody at my work. Yesterday, I did joints at a friend's party, as it was her birthday. I'm fucked. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I'm a proud non drug user, but I trusted an oat cookie at my brother's birthday, which was loaded with pot. Tomorrow is our mandatory drug screening at work, my job is government based, and I worked my ass off to get it. Anyone who tests positive or misses the test is sacked immediately. FML
Today, my boss decided to have the whole staff drug tested and fire everyone who failed. Out of an original staff of 14 people, only my boss, two coworkers and I remain. I now have four times my normal workload and am seriously thinking maybe I should've said "Yes" to drugs. FML
Today, I got fired for failing a drug test for weed. My boss is the one who sells me weed. FML
Today, I had to resign from my job because I tested positive for drugs. I've never taken drugs. FML
Today, I was told I would not be getting the job I was offered because I failed my drug test. They never gave me a drug test. FML
Today, my psycho mom walked in while I was chilling and having fun with some friends. She kicked them out and now wants to drug test me, because, "Nobody's that happy without drugs." FML
Today, my mom called me a druggie after she found out I smoked weed once. She's now threatening to sell my car, tell my boss, and ban me from seeing my fiancée. I'm 24. FML
Today, it's my 18th birthday. I called my parents and they told me that they found weed in the guest house, so they called my boarding school to drug test me. It wasn't my weed. They didn't even say, "Happy Birthday." FML
Today, someone left their drug bag on the table in the lounge at my place, probably a friend, and probably a mistake. The next minute the cops knock on the door and force their way in. Immediately the cop spots the drug bag and cuffs me. It wasn't even my bag. FML
Today, my friend came over with brownies as a treat before work. She works in a bakery so I thought it was lovely. After starting work, I became stoned. She thought it was a great prank. I was fired. FML
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Top comments
Septemberz_Storm 8
Jobs are legally bound to inform you that they do drug testing. So you were fully aware of the chance. You took your chance and failed.
DoctorPALO 14
Wth do you act like somebody MADE you smoke because it was their birthday? They aren't a very good friend if they wouldn't understand you saying, "Pass, my job has random drug testing." Ohhhh, wait, that's just because you don't want to take responsibility for your own actions, right?
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Comments (6)
CTscan 8
now if you lived somewhere where its legal...
WhataStrangeTripThisIs 24
Nah. even where it's "legal," jobs can still have a no tolerance policy and fire you. pretty much everywhere. stupid, but true. 🤷♀️
CTscan 8
yeah I know that my job only give you a drug test if you crash one of the vehicles if you know HOW to drive you're good and only have 1 drug test when you start
DLBL 23
Do they drug test the employee even if the crash is not his/her fault? Probably.
Bogrbon 27
Even in states where marijuana is legal, in absence of laws stating otherwise, like in Maine, it’s legal to fire someone for using marijuana outside working hours. Didn’t say it was justified or a good idea, but it’s legal to do so. Maybe only if they showed up impaired at work should it be justified (like alcohol.) I say “should” because in many cases the law doesn't agree.
DLBL 23
That BS should be challenged. Doing something legal while off duty should not be a fireable offense legally. I know I'm preaching to the choir.
RichardPencil 32
Refuse to take the test because you read on Facebook that drug tests could give you Covid or the vaccine.
Septemberz_Storm 8
Jobs are legally bound to inform you that they do drug testing. So you were fully aware of the chance. You took your chance and failed.
DoctorPALO 14
Wth do you act like somebody MADE you smoke because it was their birthday? They aren't a very good friend if they wouldn't understand you saying, "Pass, my job has random drug testing." Ohhhh, wait, that's just because you don't want to take responsibility for your own actions, right?