Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML
Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML
Today, I woke up to my husband trying to bite my forehead in his sleep. My response? I slapped him hard in the face. What a way to wake up. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML
Today, after struggling for hours to fall asleep with my husband's rather rattling snoring, I finally managed to drop off… only to be rudely awakened an hour later by my husband elbowing me in the face in his sleep. FML
Today, we rearranged the bedroom and my boyfriend and I switched sides of the bed. When the alarm went off, he got confused as to which side the clock was on. Instead of hitting the snooze button like he normally does, he hit me in the face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were asleep. Evidently, he was dreaming about being a UFC fighter, because, out of no where, he grabs the back of my head and punches me in the nose. I haven't been able to breathe right out of my nose all day. FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
Today, I lay in bed reflecting on my fiancé's complaint about my lack of displays of affection. I felt terrible, so I rolled over and hugged him in his sleep. He's a fully trained martial artist and his immediate reaction was to try to snap my neck. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Ben360 6
Today in the middle of the night....
DigitalKnight 0
You interrupted his conversation with the devil.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (72)
agentowner 0
was he wearing his wifebeater??
louie0501 0
did you punch him back
jjasson1296 0
$5 says he wasn't sleeping
raspackman 0
never wake a man. especially when he's talking in his sleep
rubberduckie94 13
i talk in my sleep all the time. my long suffering husband just carries on conversations with me and either records them or tells me about it the next day. its so funny. never try to wake someone up physically who is so active in there sleep especially you can not make out the words they are saying. you dont know what they are dreaming.
igary 5
I do the same thing, if not a punch it's probably a slap
TDWPForDayz 9
I shouldn't be laughing. But I am.
bleedingglitter 24
Mine will start tossing and muttering and I have learned to just leave him alone. He either wakes himself up or stops after a min or two