Today, I bought a pretty blue parakeet to keep my parrot company, and named her Sky. I went to work a few hours later. When I came home that night, I found my parrot dead. There wasn't a huge mess to clean, though; Sky had already eaten half of his corpse. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, around 12 a.m., my pet parrot said a sentence I've never heard him say before. Usually this would be exciting, but considering he said, 'I killed the bird', and that one of my two love birds mysteriously died a few days ago, it's safe to say I'm now terrified. FML
Today, my pet bird died. He had caught some illness and had been extremely sick for the past few days. He didn't die from the illness though. My dog ate him. FML
Today, I bought a parakeet for my kids. When I got home and presented it to them, they wanted to let him fly around inside. We went around the house making sure all the windows and doors were shut. Unfortunately I forgot to turn off the ceiling fan. FML
Today, I was caring for a bird that had flown into my window. I thought the poor thing wouldn't make it, when it shit in my hand, flew into my neck, then around my living room for ages before I could manage to get it out of the window. FML
Today, I woke up at 3:00 am to the sound of a bird screeching. Turns out, my roommate bought a parrot without consulting me first. Even better, my roommate expects me to pay for half of the bird's expenses. FML
Today, I found a tiny, featherless baby bird. I knew it was impossible, but I tried to keep it alive through the day. Before I could get it to the wildlife center, it died, and when I got all choked up over it, my mom started laughing at me and saying how "weak" I was. FML
Today, I was woken up by a funky smell. My dog had eaten a dead bird and thrown up all over my bed and floor. At 4 o'clock in the morning I had to clean up regurgitated bits of bird, feathers, blood and dog food. The smell still hasn't gone away. FML
Today, I returned home from a month long trip overseas to find that my bird sitter has trained my parrot to whisper, "You're going to die" in a sinister voice. FML
Today I bought a new cage, along with some toys, for my bird. I came home to find my bird had escaped its old cage. FML
Today, I was driving my parrot home from the vet. As I was driving home, I decided to let her sit on my shoulder. Something scared her, and she started flapping in my face, causing me to crash my car into a tree. FML
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Top comments
aries_fellintona 2
honestly...its two birds that didn't know each other, and you put them in a cage together? You didn't know if they would fight, love each other, etc. and your locking them in a cage together while you are at work for hours and hours.. They most likely fought to figure out who the "big dog" is, and it was a fight to the death...i am sorry your bird died but really, common since says dont do something like that til they aer accustomed to each other.
hghiPigh 0
blue parakeets are evil. mine clawed my green parakeet to death, then perched on its perch with a smug look in its eyes.
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Comments (212)
josephhhhhh 0
good your better off without that ugly thing
dharmistha 0
f your parrot's life
14MEDIC14 0
parakeet ftw
snuu_man 0
it's not dead!! it's pining for the fjords!!
Perksofbeingawal 0
I hate my hair... and heeey parrots are cool! :(
penismightier 3
wat the **** is a fjord
Perksofbeingawal 0
Hahahahahaha 65. I have no clue either...
MrsLender_fml 3
nice **** 65
brillababy 0
******* ass
dr_random 11
fjord - long, narrow inlet with steep sides or cliffs, created in a valley carved by glacial activity
DocBastard 40
To all you poor, deprived folks who are wondering what a fjord is and why the parrot is pining for it, do a YouTube search on "Monty Python dead parrot" and watch it 427 times. Beautiful plumage!
urdirtyolduncle 15
actually its FOP's life because those damn parrots are really expensive. Here, in NY, they can go for at least $1,200
Queen_of_Night 20
PINING FOR THE FJORDS??? WHAT KIND OF TALK IS THAT???
dr_random 11
He's not pinin', he's passed on! This parrot is no more!
snuu_man 0
lol you guys gotta watch Monty python
kiran_fml 5
0.0 creepy parakeet
MrBoredGuy 1
creepy? that's so badass
Alexxcunningham 0
win ^
aceman1992 9
He now has the thirst for blood, be carefull op.
TheNastyCat 7
Paulie wanted a cracker… ONCE.
falloutNV 0
survival of the fittest
docscientist 10
Only if the parakeet mates.
cradle6 13
Yes. that's why you never ever keep birds in the same cage. Never.
MrsDruidess 23
birds are nansty evil little things that can give you the clap!! OP pick a better pet
hghiPigh 0
blue parakeets are evil. mine clawed my green parakeet to death, then perched on its perch with a smug look in its eyes.
tammy0312 6
Parakeets are evil! I had one for two years and everytime I bought a companion for it, it wouldn't last a week. She would kill all of them! Luckily she ran away, Lol!
Alexxcunningham 0
how the **** can a parakeet run away? xD don't you mean fly?
Blacksabbath211 9
think roadrunner from looney tunes xDS
Queen_of_Night 20
That's a roadrunner. They're made to run.
tammy0312 6
I thought that by putting 'lol' immediately afterwards it would hint that I was joking. It obviously flew away, it was just a pun.
Friaza 29
I find it impossible to believe that several people who have an FML account, read this FML also have a parakeet and decided to place an other parakeet in the same cage resulting in one dieing and ALSO decided to post a comment about it on this FML whilst not feeling emotional at all.
jakebville 9
You are a royal dumbass. Millions of people view FML daily, so there is a high probability that others may have been in the same situation.
maxisis_fml 6
I'm never getting a parakeet. 0_0
rinzlerkitty94 31
#188 Your comment makes absolutely no sense.
ddawgg5523 0
lol!!!!!! cannibalistic parakeet!! seriously though, kill the damn bird before it kills you.
sadistmonkey 19
cannibalism?
timma90 4
Parakeets are relatives to parrots. :)
WishResign 0
14, it ate its own kind...
ScaughtieHolden 11
No it didn't. Parakeets aren't the same species ad parrots. -_-
insanesna1l 0
wait...what?? parakeets and parrots aren't the same species? is your idol hitler by any chance?
BagleHead 6
It's like eating monkey
Crystiella 0
So, you're saying if a human eats another human and they aren't the same race it's not cannabilism?
tencentsakiss 19
129, humans are all the same species, no matter what race they are. Parakeets and birds are only in the same family, as are humans and chimpanzees. It would be more comparable to a human eating a chimpanzee.
WishResign 0
134, you're the 1st one to make sense. the way everyone explained it had me unconvinced. I thought a bird is a bird, they both fly, so it's the same... but the monkey/ human example makes more sense, now. everyone else that explained it, it was still ambiguous.
mudkipsan 19
#134 probably meant parakeets and parrots are different species of bird, just like humans and chimpanzees are different species of primate. It's not entirely correct, as parakeet refers to just a few species of the order parrot, but close enough.
picklezz123 5
Oh my I never knew parrots were into cannibulism
Shyke 0
First off, it's "cannibalism". Second, it was a parrot and a parakeet. Not two parrots. Not two parakeets.
Alexxcunningham 0
it was a bird. it's cannibalism. so by your logic, if I kill a black man and eat him, I'm not a cannibal. dumb ****. learn your facts.
UpsidedownKayak 9
#79, All humans are the same species, there are many different species of birds. By your logic, if all birds are the same, then all mammals are the same. So, if you kill a cow and eat it, then you are a cannibal. Learn YOUR facts, dumb ****.
Alexxcunningham 0
I'm comparing birds to birds. that's a specific animal. if humans eat any other humans, cows eat other cows, or a dog eats another dog, and it's called cannibalism, then a bird eating another bird is cannibalism. the specific type of bird shouldn't matter. it was a bird eating another bird.
UpsidedownKayak 9
I think you missed my point. All birds are NOT the same as specific species of animal, like a cow. Is an eagle the same as a crow, or a turkey, or a pheasant? No, they are not the same. You can't say they are cannibal if they don't eat their same species, you can call them predatory.
Alexxcunningham 0
so, because the birds aren't exactly the same, it's not cannibalistic? that, my good sir, is stupid on science's part. well, to be kind, you may be right, but I completely disagree with that. I believe this was cannibalism. and no matter how much science "fact" you have, I'll always think that(:
docscientist 10
It's not stupid on science's part, it's idiotic on your unwillingness to recognize the definition of cannibalism and your failure to recognize that a 'bird' is not a species.
docscientist 10
What's hilarious is that you're using a scientific term created to describe a specific behavior, reject it, and come up with your own ridiculous definition so you can remain willfully ignorant.
dr_random 11
^ win :D
tencentsakiss 19
It's been a long time since biology so forgive me if I misspell some of my taxonomy. While I agree that this isn't really cannibalism, comparing a human eating a cow to a parrot eating a parakeet isn't really the best example. Parrots and Parakeets only share the class aves, the order psittaciformes, and the family psittacidae. Humans are in the family hominidae, so you'd have to pick another member of the family hominidae. A better comparison would be a human eating a gorilla.
Rainbow_dumpster 28
You're a racist, #79.
taffy1239 3
a hawk is a bird. and they eat small birds. it should not be considered cannibalism. end of story.
Bobissmall 13
105 used words i don't understand, and therefore they are right.
youngclench 0
121, You're dumb. What was there to not understand?
XKeirraNicoleX 1
Okay, can we have a sense of humor? We don't need the real definition on cannibalism. It's a bird eating another bird. It was a joke. You know like haha? Something you're supposed to laugh at. So, let's grow up, stop arguing over what cannibalism means, and take a joke. Holy shit. Get over yourselves. Yes, the cannibalism joke didn't perfectly go along with the definition of cannibalism, but obviously you people aren't perfect, either. Learn how to take a ******* joke.
joa76 3
"Although budgerigars are often, especially in American English, called parakeets, this term refers to any of a number of small parrots with long, flat tails." So, technically, what most people call parakeets are, in fact, the same species as (some) parrots (because there is more than one species of parrot).
docscientist 10
I'm certain alex... wasn't joking.
DigitalKnight 0
It's possessed. You are next.
Not_Ever_Telling 3
Wow, that's kind of cannibalistic...
Shyke 0
If by "kind of" you mean "not at all". Then yeah, that's "kind of" like cannibalism.
Perksofbeingawal 0
Sorry love, but they are two different species; therefore it can't be called "cannibalism." But it's okay, I know what you were tryna' say. :)
Alexxcunningham 0
45 & 63, a bird eating a bird is cannibalism. but, by your logic, I can go eat someone not white, and I wouldn't be a cannibal. stfu dumb asses.
livewire1701 8
You should have paid more attention in school. if you had you might know the difference between species and races. Don't insult people just because you don't understand the difference.
docscientist 10
No 80, it would be more like you eating a cow, or any other mammal.
tencentsakiss 19
Actually, it's more like a human eating a gorilla or a chimpanzee, because they share a common family in taxomomy as do parrots and parakeets. I do agree that that still isn't cannibalism, however. :)
porky36 0
yo what if it kils u too. I say u get rid of it
angel55033 12
your new bird is a murderer, sleep with one eye open now!!!
dharmistha 0
mean tat
MissFukMyLuck 0
damn that is a nice peice
docscientist 10
Pretty epic tattoo.
Remix920 0
daum sexy o.o