Today, in between the passing times at school, one of my classmates opened the door to my next class, so I turned to tell him thank you. Apparently, he was opening it for the teacher who was leaving. I collided with her and her very hot cup of coffee. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried to be nice to a cute girl at the café by holding the door open for her. I smiled, leaned on the door frame, and poured my entire cup of coffee down my leg. She still said thanks before walking away. FML
Today, as I was about to open a door at school, a student opened it and hit me. As I recovered and was about to open it again, someone else opened the door, hitting me again. Everyone laughed. FML
Today, at my art school, during the class my teacher left the classroom. I stood up from my seat to ask my friend something. When I sat back down, one of my guy classmates was sitting there. I sat on his lap and right at that moment my teacher came back. FML
Today, I tried to jokingly hold the door shut so my friend, who I'd seen walking down the hall to our class, couldn't get in. It was funny, until my new teacher yelled "Open the damn door!" from the other side. FML
Today, I was teaching when I saw a student leave her chair and brazenly head for the door. I clapped her on the shoulder and said, "Going somewhere, miss?" She vomited all over my pants. FML
Today, during a snowstorm, I opened my car door to get out. The wind snapped it wide open, then immediately changed course and swung it back at me just as I stepped out, spilling an entire hot cup of coffee all over me. FML
Today, I was walking with a friend after buying two cups of steaming hot coffee. While crossing the busiest street in town I tripped and fell, spilling the coffee all over me. My friend didn't notice I fell right in front of her and tripped over me spilling her coffee on me as well. FML
Today, I was late for class. I have extreme social anxiety, so I quietly slipped into the huge, packed auditorium, trying to be as quiet as possible. When I was almost to my seat, I accidentally kicked a teacher's coffee down the steps. The entire class looked at me and some clapped. FML
Today, I held the door open for an old lady, before realizing she was a teacher taking 20-plus kids to lunch at local burger joint, all of whom got in front of me in the line to order. FML
Today, I was passing notes in class with my crush. I started to pour my heart out and tell him about how I've liked him for years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it, laughed, and tore it up. He then looked at me and said, "I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome." FML
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Top comments
MermaidSongXOXO 6
I've always wanted to say this: You just got BURNED :]
yellowbirdx 0
Sounds like that scene in Mean Girls where Cady walks into Miss Norbury on her first day at school. Hilarious. "Maybe we can discuss this another time. When my shirt isn't see-through."
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Comments (59)
perdix 31
Isn't this that Van Halen song, "Hot for Teacher?" I remember the video -- it had Juan Valdez and his burro in it. I don't feel tardy.
perdix 31
Plus it was a blatant commercial sell-out for Columbian coffee. Videos like that are why MTV doesn't show them anymore. David Lee Roth is balding. . . how's that for payback?
WreckerGirl 4
How old are you, Perdix? I always wonder...
XDNurse 0
I can not even begin to fathom why... but everytime I read one of her comments I can mo longer enjoy the fml... ;( They really annoy me. #16 that's cute ;)
Pearljammer001 0
hi perdix!
Ajjas013 6
First impression fail.
wantsomejewinu 0
But you fail at everything, Abdulla. :)
Ajjas013 6
It takes a lot to get you out of your hidey hole huh Ren?
wantsomejewinu 0
There's only some things worth commenting, obviously. But, I'm not gonna bother to deal with you since you're obsessed with someone who doesn't even give two ***** about you. OH, I heard you had a crush on Perdix. Cute, huh. Too bad he's into chicks. ;)
Ajjas013 6
And who would that be? If you're talking about you then you're wrong. I completely forget about you until I log on FML and see your comments. You watch Titanic and think of me... Wow. *Tries to savor cake after Ren destroyed the peace*
Ajjas013 6
You heard? Or you took the time to make it up?
wantsomejewinu 0
Nah, you're obsessed with your ex girlfriend and Perdix. LOLOLOLOL. Who cares what I said about the Titanic? What about when you said how cute my lips are and how they would fit into yours like a puzzle? Wow, you're weird as hell. Bye.
Ajjas013 6
^^ WIN Wait, what?
Pearljammer001 0
true ^
alex1432 9
you fail!!!!!!!!!!!
jollykilla704 0
burn. litteraly
Extacy23 0
jollykilla = D bag
sydneyanne 0
awww that sucks balls
crazysicknasty 0
then why dont you watch where ur going hahahah
xlovelessx 0
I'm sorry to hear that fyl
beastlydevon 0
this is gonna be bad when you drive. when you go throught intersection your turn back and say thank you to the light then you collide with a car. omg coffee spilled on my the world is going to end with my 4th degree burn!!!!!