Today, I woke up to something crawling on my leg. Thinking it might be a spider, I jumped out frantically to check. The good news: it's not a spider. The bad news: it's a bedbug. My apartment was just treated for them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was glad to find out that all the bedbugs have been eaten. Now I have a spider infestation. FML
Today, after finally going to therapy for anxiety like everyone wanted, I discovered the itching feeling that kept me awake at night was actually caused by a bedbug infestation. FML
Today, I found out that the little red dots all over my body aren't some horrible disease like I originally thought. They're bedbug bites. I've managed to not notice a huge infestation for 5 months. FML
Today, I woke up to a huge, disgusting bug next to my bed. As I tried to squish it, it suddenly flew off at high speed. Now I'm lying in bed, awake and terrified because I can hear it buzzing around but can't see it anywhere. FML
Today, after three visits from exterminators and another from a steam cleaner, I still have bedbugs. FML
Today, three days after finally having a bed to sleep on, I woke up with multiple bedbug bites. I can't use my blankets, wear any of my clothes and it's back to sleeping on the floor for me. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, I discovered I have bed bugs. I have nowhere else to sleep and I won't be able to afford a new mattress for at least a year. I'd better get used to these giant welts. FML
Today, I woke up to something tickling me. Thinking it was my cat, I reached under the covers to give her a friendly scratch behind the ears. I imagine the giant spider that was actually there enjoyed my terrified screams. FML
Today, I discovered that my bed has a flea infestation. I discovered it after sleeping naked in it for about an hour. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
pandalover69 26
It's really sad when the spider is the more preferred option.
ragnarok1540 39
Sometimes it takes more than one treatment to exterminate a large infestation. Also, if you have not already done so for the previous treatment, wash all you clothing and linens on hot setting and bag them air-tight in garbage bags. Keep what you are not using inside the bags for 6 weeks if possible. Also, for your bedding, they sell zippered covers for the boxspring and mattress, as well as plastic double lipped cups to place under the legs of the bed. Some powdered diatomaceous earth may be helpful to sprinkle around the floor and corners of the room, but be warns that bedbugs are resistant to most chemical agents and usually require heat or cold to kill, and unfortunately may live for up to a year unfed! I know it is a pain to go through all of this, but it is better than living with bedbugs. I've been through this at my previous apartment and finally moved once a second treatment was done and the next inspection was negative. Hope everything works out for you.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (29)
Death_The_Kid15 20
Try rubbing alcohol, I heard it kills them almost instantly.
evilplatypus 39
Half a second on Google tells me that rubbing alcohol sprayed directly on them only kills about half of them - so if you count the eggs, the larvae, and the ones in hiding, you'd be better off just getting a professional.
Death_The_Kid15 20
But hey, dealing with half is worse than dealing with all.
anlong93 9
#11, They breed rather quickly. Sure, you can kill half, but that really won't help. Fire, on the other hand.... I hate bed bugs. My grandma once got a second hand couch, and it was infested. We didn't know until I was sleeping on it. There were so many, it woke me up and I could see all of them on my legs. Good lord. I ran to the shower, bagged all the clothes I was wearing, and when I got out, I put clean clothes on and slept on the floor in another room. Worst night of my life. I still get paranoid when a sheet tickles me in the middle of the night, and this was a decade ago. I would rather set fire to the bed outside than deal with that again.
Mynamewontfi 40
That bug sure knows how to bug you.
pandalover69 26
It's really sad when the spider is the more preferred option.
ragnarok1540 39
Sometimes it takes more than one treatment to exterminate a large infestation. Also, if you have not already done so for the previous treatment, wash all you clothing and linens on hot setting and bag them air-tight in garbage bags. Keep what you are not using inside the bags for 6 weeks if possible. Also, for your bedding, they sell zippered covers for the boxspring and mattress, as well as plastic double lipped cups to place under the legs of the bed. Some powdered diatomaceous earth may be helpful to sprinkle around the floor and corners of the room, but be warns that bedbugs are resistant to most chemical agents and usually require heat or cold to kill, and unfortunately may live for up to a year unfed! I know it is a pain to go through all of this, but it is better than living with bedbugs. I've been through this at my previous apartment and finally moved once a second treatment was done and the next inspection was negative. Hope everything works out for you.
ThrottleJockey 36
Agreed, I went though this myself as well.
awspinks77 7
Those are as difficult as fitting an entire 18 wheeler into the hatchback of a Prius, in the middle of the night, during an EF5 tornado, to kill. I'd try some more powerful treatment.
Noemmyforyou 14
I mean, what part about "goodnight; don't let the bed bugs bite" did you not understand? On a serious note: Good luck getting rid of those little *******, OP.
DoomedGemini 38
They're hard to get rid of. We're trying diatomaceous earth.
evilplatypus 39
DE works best when done in conjunction with sprays or other treatments.
tomvertigo 17
Careful with DE. If used incorrectly it can cause massive respiratory inflammation leading up to and including death. Just a warning from a pro ;)
redscarf_fml 8
Way to look at the bright side, OP!
originalunicorn 20
I have a couple friends who got bed bugs & they both used diatomacious earth & it worked for them
zombiekitten87 12
The diatomaceous earth/borax/steam all work ok but the best thing to do for your peace of mind is spray yourself and your bed with Off or some other mosquito repellant spray. My neighbors through the wall moved out recently and left a lovely gift behind. Luckily we had very few to deal with, but even the exterminator said using Off was an excellent idea. Also you will have to wash literally every piece of clothing or linen you have in very hot water/dry on the hot setting. Put everything you won't use immediately in space bags and do it in a "clean room" like your kitchen that's unlikely to have an infestation. Move your bed far away from the wall, treat your mattress/box spring/bed frame with steam and bug spray, get the cups for the legs of the bed like someone mentioned and keep your linens off the floor. The cups should have a little of the DE or baby powder in the well so you can catch any bugs that might try to climb up the bed and you can tell if you still have a problem that way.