Today, I was glad to find out that all the bedbugs have been eaten. Now I have a spider infestation. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I woke up to something crawling on my leg. Thinking it might be a spider, I jumped out frantically to check. The good news: it's not a spider. The bad news: it's a bedbug. My apartment was just treated for them. FML
Today, after three visits from exterminators and another from a steam cleaner, I still have bedbugs. FML
Today, I discovered that my bed has a flea infestation. I discovered it after sleeping naked in it for about an hour. FML
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
Today, some spider must have had babies somewhere in the walls, because every five minutes I seem to find yet another spider on my ceiling, in my cupboards, under the furniture, everywhere. I’m so fed up of smashing them, I’m thinking of getting the house fumigated. FML
Today, I found out that the little red dots all over my body aren't some horrible disease like I originally thought. They're bedbug bites. I've managed to not notice a huge infestation for 5 months. FML
Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML
Today, I had to sleep on couch cushions on the kitchen floor because I saw a tiny spider crawl under my bed. FML
Today, the spiders in my house are so big that they catch wasps in their webs. FML
Today, after finally going to therapy for anxiety like everyone wanted, I discovered the itching feeling that kept me awake at night was actually caused by a bedbug infestation. FML
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Top comments
sturschaedel 27
I absolutely hate spiders. But in this specific case I would choose them over the alternative.
ab290 10
get a lizard to eat the spiders lol
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Comments (45)
ab290 10
get a lizard to eat the spiders lol
KyoshiroT 32
then you'll need a bird or snake to take care of the lizard infestation, then a eagle/hawk, then the military, and aliens.
Dilexar 26
i was gonna make a "old lady that swallowed the fly" reference, but you sir have definitely stepped the game up.
JocelynKaulitz 28
Time to move…
guy_incognito___ 20
Sleep is for the weak.
sturschaedel 27
I absolutely hate spiders. But in this specific case I would choose them over the alternative.
DraconicFeline 31
Same here! Honestly, having bedbugs would be the real FML here. I'd say the spiders saved you, OP.
Moskaaa7 26
Burning down your house is the only logical thing to do here.
TeraBaap 21
Time to build up a food chain!
xx000o 27
The couch can be a wonderful friend.
brittanywashere 14
Well. Time to burn your house down and move.
Unlucky1232 20
well spider's will be easier to take care of and less of a problem. unless it's like a brown recluse or something in that case GET THE HELL OUTTA THERE!
species4872 20
Do not break the food chain, It's just you and them now. try frying them. bon appetit.
hellnosucka 27
I'll give you my pickled spider recipe, op. Haven't tried it yet but I heard it's not too poisonous.