somuchforthat
Australia
Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
gaggin
Beverly Hills, United States
Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML
igotpride
United States
Today, I woke up and coughed up the spider I thought I'd killed last night. FML
Anonymous
Warman, Canada
Juicy breakfast
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
dre_bro11
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
Australia
Act of kindness
Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML
dirtbikeguy
Chicago, United States
Today, I had a dream about a giant spider crawling around in my mouth. I woke up to find that dreams sometimes do come true. FML
Anonymous
Littleton, United States
Top o' the mornin' to ya
Today, I woke up bright and early… because a spider crawled into my ear. FML
Spiderchick
Germany
Hmmmm, breakfast
Today, I found out that the stories about how you swallow insects and spiders in your sleep are true, as I woke up to a funny taste in my mouth and the remains of a spider stuck to my braces. FML
spiderinmylips
United States
Tasty snack
Today, I was laying out in my backyard trying to get some color when I felt a little tickle on my lips. I rubbed them together to satisfy the itch, when I felt a sort of crunchiness popping between them. I had crushed a spider between my lips and its legs were still moving. FML
HighasaCloud
Today, while typing at my desk, I leaned back in my chair to stretch my arms. A spider dangling from the ceiling must have been watching me since it had perfect timing on its descent right into my open yawning mouth. FML
yuckspider
United States
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Top comments
Domonator 16
Spider: Today I was taking a walk, minding my own business, when a heartless giant bit my leg off. FML
lexuality 0
euuuuuuurrrrggghhh. i had a friend who had the same experiance. gross. fyl.
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Comments (143)
bms1996 12
*HURL*
Splayd 10
Without looking, I can guarantee that some moron is going to state the (false) statistic that, while sleeping, humans swallow a certain number of spiders a year.
odeather 8
You know the average person eats 8 spiders every night? Just sayin not as uncommon as you think..... Because of this our body has adapted to control this type of thing from happening.... Think about it you don't want the spider outside biting you all over especially if it's poisonous
CosMicShelle 5
Actually, the average person eats about 8 spiders in their lifetime... Not 1000.
MacWorms 10
Don't worry I eat spider for lunch on Saturdays their delightful LET THE THUMBS DOWN BEGIN
123Puppy 33
I feel SO bad for you! ☹️