Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find a very gorgeous girl in my bed. Her only words to me were "did anything happen?" When I replied yes she began to cry. Nice to know I was someone's rock bottom. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML
Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and said, "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
Today, after a long night of drinking and partying, I woke up in my bed next to a beast of a woman. At least I know I made it home safely. FML
Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML
Today, a girl I have been wanting for years told me she was drunk and needed me to take her home. On the way home she was very frisky and flirty, and I kept telling her to wait till we got to her place. When we finally arrived, she passed out on me and I was stuck there watching her sleep. FML
Today, I was sleeping in my room when I awoke to an unfamiliar female voice in my apartment, followed by a thud. I walked out to find a drunk girl I've never met collapsed in my doorway. After puking all over the place, she had me call her father, who picked her up 10 minutes later. FML
Today, it's 2:23 in the morning, and my drunken girlfriend has just rung me up from a party where she's the only girl there. She seems to be having a great time. FML
Today, I woke up in a daze after a long night drinking. I felt a subtle nudge on my shoulder. I was at my ex-girlfriend's house, passed out on top of her, with no pants on. Her dad was, in so many words, informing me that I had to leave immediately. FML
Today, after a month of sobriety, I woke up in my ex-girlfriend's house with absolutely no recollection as to how I got there. FML
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Top comments
polico_wolf 0
she probably has a boyfriend and is crying that she accidently cheated on him or maybe she's a virgin and she didnt want to lost her viginaty to a complete stranger of maybe she didnt want to have sex with a complete stranger it has nothing to do with you.
LemonadePink 0
Dude, that's just the way most girls are. Guys think it's awesome to hook up with random hot girls. Girls...actually give a **** about sleeping with random guys, well girls that aren't ****** care anyway. She just ****** up, drank too much and had a random hook up. It has nothing to do with YOU, just herself. Get over yourself.
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Comments (79)
besskelly123 0
i feel for the girl. she might have had a boyfriend. or something. i mean if i had drunken sex with someone id become upset afterwards as well. its nothing personal i can bet u. shes probably just upset.
Blue_Deamon 0
I dont get why people feel for the girl, she was drunk not passed out when it happened. Drunk or not you still have morals and know what your doing if she didnt want to she wouldnt have done it. Ive been plenty drunk plenty of times never once did something stupid that i didnt want to do.
psychoxxxinvader 3
She probably had a boyfriend or moral reasons. However, if she was so "moral" she probably wouldn't have gotten so drunk in the first place. You: keep it in your pants because one night stands just make you look like a man *****. The girl: if you can't handle the alcohol don't ******* drink.
kesha_fml 0
score
Secret_Fire_King 0
No, I see it all the time in movies.. If the chick was drunk, you raped her.. If you were drunk, well, that is no excuse for raping a chick.. ----- But *hi-five* OP.. You just tapped that..
scabrakazaam 0
Why does everyone find it funny if its the chick but have sympathy if its a guy? Thats a lame double standard. Regardless of whats on the inside, he's still fugly.
ucanhascheezburg 0
she probably had HIV and just gave it you. LOL
lovehelena 0
louis ck
bella789 8
awwh! it's probably because she was still a virgin and didn't want you to be the one to take her virginity! or maybe she is married ( not to possible though). it's probably not u, unless u really feel like your Rock bottom //:.
ragzilla 0
oh, you're the mistake from superbad!