Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find a very gorgeous girl in my bed. Her only words to me were "did anything happen?" When I replied yes she began to cry. Nice to know I was someone's rock bottom. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML
Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and said, "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
Today, after a long night of drinking and partying, I woke up in my bed next to a beast of a woman. At least I know I made it home safely. FML
Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML
Today, a girl I have been wanting for years told me she was drunk and needed me to take her home. On the way home she was very frisky and flirty, and I kept telling her to wait till we got to her place. When we finally arrived, she passed out on me and I was stuck there watching her sleep. FML
Today, I was sleeping in my room when I awoke to an unfamiliar female voice in my apartment, followed by a thud. I walked out to find a drunk girl I've never met collapsed in my doorway. After puking all over the place, she had me call her father, who picked her up 10 minutes later. FML
Today, it's 2:23 in the morning, and my drunken girlfriend has just rung me up from a party where she's the only girl there. She seems to be having a great time. FML
Today, I woke up in a daze after a long night drinking. I felt a subtle nudge on my shoulder. I was at my ex-girlfriend's house, passed out on top of her, with no pants on. Her dad was, in so many words, informing me that I had to leave immediately. FML
Today, after a month of sobriety, I woke up in my ex-girlfriend's house with absolutely no recollection as to how I got there. FML
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Top comments
polico_wolf 0
she probably has a boyfriend and is crying that she accidently cheated on him or maybe she's a virgin and she didnt want to lost her viginaty to a complete stranger of maybe she didnt want to have sex with a complete stranger it has nothing to do with you.
LemonadePink 0
Dude, that's just the way most girls are. Guys think it's awesome to hook up with random hot girls. Girls...actually give a **** about sleeping with random guys, well girls that aren't ****** care anyway. She just ****** up, drank too much and had a random hook up. It has nothing to do with YOU, just herself. Get over yourself.
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Comments (79)
kindness 0
she could have been that way with anyone. drunken sex is not usually safe sex. but whatever, YDI for getting drunk.
Ninjaface 0
You have to love the irony here: she hit rock bottom because you hit HER bottom.
ragsy 7
Oh screw her. Typical act. "I've never done anything like that before!" Yeah, right--not since last weekend.
ForgottenRemix0 0
lmao, glad im not you...
cconeus 0
yeah she was probably just sad she found out she's a *****.... totally not your fault.
ClownSmilely 0
Well hell do you think I could get her number?
MaddogTotten 0
The drunk=rape excuse is bullshit. If you were more drunk than she was then technically she raped you. Unless 1. she's a bartender, 2. a professional party girl, or 3. your a total pussy - there should be no way she out drank you. Women can't use a "double-standard" if we're not allowed to. Now if your the kind of creeper that goes out sober and preys on inebriated women then yes, you raped her.
MaddogTotten 0
Maybe he is a part time therapist.
jchansfan 0
You guys need to chill. I think the OP probably felt pretty bad he made the girl cry. Its not that he thinks he's the victim because she cried. How can so many people not get that these stories are posted for the dark humour aspect more than the "Oh no my life is ruined" aspect. As for the rape thing, sounds like they were both wasted, so no one's really the victim. Curious though, if a drunk woman throws herself at a sober/less drunk dude, is it actually rape? Because technically, isn't the consent there? Especially since in some cases she could even be the instigator?
MaddogTotten 0
I get it, just trying to quell the feminist "don't use a double standard" jerkbags that seem to troll around here. To answer your question, realistically you are right. Unfortunately in a legal sense, no you are wrong. In order to legally give consent, you must be of sound mind, and stay of sound mind with the ability to withdraw your consent until the actual act of intercourse is initiated. It is the same reason why sex with someone who is unconscious is illegal, even if they say it is okay. They cannot legally give consent for you to have sex with them because once they are unconscious they do not have the ability to withdraw that consent before you start the actual act of sex. On a side note, once actual penetration has occurred, there isn't anything anyone can do or say to make the rest of the act non-consensual. The law actually protects your right to "finish" once the act has been initiated. Apparently even lawyers realize there is a reasonable window where it would be unreasonable to stop.
omghehehe 0
scary, u know all the details in ur second paragraph. either ur in law or ..... :/
waterynuggets 0
"On a side note, once actual penetration has occurred, there isn't anything anyone can do or say to make the rest of the act non-consensual. The law actually protects your right to "finish" once the act has been initiated. Apparently even lawyers realize there is a reasonable window where it would be unreasonable to stop." Lolwut. Citation severely needed, ************. [Example] A woman could say stop because she no longer wants to continue, maybe she's in a lot of pain for one reason or another. Stop means STOP and no means NO.
valmont_fml 0
Ummm... no? I'm pretty sure that the law goes with the principle that consent can be withdrawn at *any* time. From either side. Seriously, where the hell did you *get* that? Besides, there *is* a double standard. It's mostly come about because of the differing gender roles that people are expected to adhere to in society.
Paige_Nicole10 0
um she was probobly upset because she either didnt want to do anything for moral reasons or didnt have a relationship with you