Today, I got a mammogram, after feeling some discomfort. After the exam, I mentioned to my mother my doctor referred the test, because even though I'm still in my twenties, I have a family history of breast cancer. She told coworkers, friends, and family about my health condition. Now they all know. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML
Today, I went to the doctor for a suspicious lump under my armpit, so he suggested a breast examination. While pressing all over them he said, "We're gonna have to send you for an X-ray because you have the most lumpy breasts I've ever felt in my life." FML
Today, I was diagnosed with polycystic ovaries and confided in my mom, after being told I would have trouble having kids. Five minutes later, I hear the whole family laughing about it downstairs. FML
Today, my classmate overheard me on the phone making an appointment at the women’s health center. The dumb bitch told everyone I was going to the clinic for STD treatment. I was scheduling my biopsy for a lump in my breast. FML
Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML
Today, I was giving myself a breast exam for lumps. I heard laughing, looked around and saw that the 12 year-old neighbor and his friends were watching through the window. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's because I could feel something solid in my breasts, and I wanted to get it checked, just to be safe. Turns out it was my ribs. Oops. FML
Today, I found out that my extremely-flat chested cousin recently got a boob job. When my mom found out, she said "Oh that's great! They look so good!". Then she looks at me and tells me that I should get one. Everyone including my own mother thinks I should get a boob job. FML
Today, I overheard someone at the mall telling his friend, "So I'm going in for a brain scan." Trying to be funny, I piped up, "Better hope they find something!" Turns out that had been the end of his sentence, and the scan is to see if his cancer has spread. FML
Today, my mom is going with me for a general check-up at the doctor's office. She just told me she had a nightmare last night that she went to the doctor with me, and he told her I'm pregnant. I am pregnant. I was about to tell her. FML
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Top comments
kimdaa 13
Eventually your circle of friends will grow and gradually you will stop sharing such intimate parts of your life with your mother. This isn't a knock against your mother, this just what happens as we grow older and more independent.
RichardPencil 32
You'll make a lot of money from suing your mom for HIPAA violations. You won't get anything in her will, but you'll get the money up front instead.
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
You'll make a lot of money from suing your mom for HIPAA violations. You won't get anything in her will, but you'll get the money up front instead.
kimdaa 13
Eventually your circle of friends will grow and gradually you will stop sharing such intimate parts of your life with your mother. This isn't a knock against your mother, this just what happens as we grow older and more independent.
D J's MOM 17
don't tell her anything ever again. the other poster is right, that's a hippa violation.
RichardPencil 32
I was just kidding about HIPAA. It only applies between patients and healthcare professionals, and not to blabbermouth relatives to only the rules of decorum and decency apply. Evidently, her mom doesn't have those.