Today, I went to my gyn to see what a painful lump is under my armpit. Turns out it's breast tissue, and yes, it will fill up with milk when I'm pregnant. I essentially have three boobs. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to the doctor thinking I had breast cancer. Turns out, I have a third boob. FML
Today, my doctor informed me that the pea-sized bump under my arm is a "third breast." That's not what I meant every time I said I wanted more tits. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for a suspicious lump under my armpit, so he suggested a breast examination. While pressing all over them he said, "We're gonna have to send you for an X-ray because you have the most lumpy breasts I've ever felt in my life." FML
Today, after a 3-day induced delivery for my twins, and after getting stitches down there, I woke up to boobs that are the size of footballs, and still no milk coming out. The pain of chopping them off at this point would be more bearable. FML
Today, I went to the doctor because recently I've had a white liquid coming from my breast. I found out it's milk. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's because I could feel something solid in my breasts, and I wanted to get it checked, just to be safe. Turns out it was my ribs. Oops. FML
Today, I noticed that I have gained enough weight to give me back boobs. FML
Today, I'm on a pill that "may cause breast tenderness". My 32E breasts took that to mean swell up a size, become heavy as lead, be so sore I can't move without a bra on, and stiffen my neck and back muscles so badly I thought I had an ear infection. This will last "a few weeks to months". FML
Today, I realized the birthmark I have on my chest isn't a birthmark at all; it's a third nipple. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's to find out why I was producing small amounts of milky liquid from my nipples, even though I'm not pregnant. When she asked me to show her, I squirted on her shirt. FML
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Top comments
boxter57 3
Will your baby suck on your armpit?
AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12
Wow three boobs? The guys must love you >;)
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Comments (247)
whited666 0
Something men only dream of :D
FYLDeep 26
Yes. No doctor wants to be left out of potential breast examining opportunities.
walrusman 0
Anybody else turned on by this???
Hannahrayne 0
HAHAHHA THAT'S AMAZING!!!!!!
jabaybay415 0
ew
hubbs666 2
Sally the camel had... THREE HUMPS!
Lily_lops95 0
Ew?
Annionomys 1
@40 did you or did you not see the word "essentially" in there?!?
DocBastard 40
I do believe I did, considering I purposely used the same word to mock OP. Subtlety is lost on you, isn't it?
RufusCade 7
OP, don't listen to the enfants above. The third (and fourth) boob was the way my wife discovered that she was pregnant with our second child since she got them with the first, too. They went away as soon as the kids were born. And yes, they were uncomfortable she says. :-)
inpuredeceit 14
If it was in a normal location, I'd say you were gifted. Under your arm? Ew.