Today, I went to babysit. I was told the parents would be gone when I arrived. I went and started playing with the kids. All of a sudden I heard a scream. I opened the parents' door with a knife in hand to find them having sex. I got paid so adults could get laid. While I was there. 6 ft. away. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was babysitting. Being kind, I went to grab their mail, while their 4 year old ate lunch. He locked me out, wrecked the house, and let me in right when he saw their car two hours later. I didn't get paid. I paid them. FML
Today, I babysat the neighbors’ evil kids. They dropped them over at my house and I played with them for five hours. After taking the brats back home and putting them to bed, their mother asked me what time I came back to the house. She only paid me for the 20 minutes I was in their house. FML
Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
Today, I went to babysit eight kids under the age of ten, all by myself. After five hours of Hell, the parents finally came back from the ASU game. I got paid $5. FML
Today, I was babysitting for my mom's coworkers two little boys. they went to bed around 9 and I was watching a movie on HBO. I fell asleep before the movie was over. I woke up to the parents walking into the house. I looked at the TV, and porn was on. FML
Today, while on vacation, I realized my parents and grandparents had been running off and doing quite a few errands lately. After doing some sleuthing, I discovered they were taking turns having blood-curdling sex in our other hotel room down the hall. FML
Today, I babysat the brattiest and most foul-mouthed 8-year-old I've ever met. After I survived three hours of it, his parents finally came home. He claimed I'd invited a boy over and that we did "stuff" on the couch all evening. They believed him. I didn't get paid, to say the least. FML
Today, being a divorced dad, I had a very important job opportunity for which I would be gone overnight. When I returned, I found my son locked in his room while the babysitter was having sex with a man in my bed. FML
Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one of them duct taped a knife to a toy machine gun, lit the barbecue on fire, and ran around like a wild banshee screaming obscenities. The other one got scared and climbed onto the roof of the house. FML
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Top comments
mobius8 0
Wow, you were prepared to defend their kids with a knife? That's awesome. I'd hire you.
hidude12 0
awkward turtle...
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Comments (125)
Dave350 0
From another angle: Maybe the parents, think hot parents, were getting ready to go out. Then she put on this really hot LBD along with some 5" heels and he got aroused. Or she leaned over naked to put some mascara on, he brushed her bare a-- with his big ____ walking by and she grabbed it.... etc. etc. etc. Happens to the best of us.
abbaker 0
And that's why you should never have kids... you don't have to pay other people so you can have sex in "privacy"...
kk3211 0
i second #11, probably would have been FML if you ran away and they found out. Very honorable of you....
XOfiestypixie 0
#70: the parents SAID they'd be gone when the babysitter arrived, but in reality were not. The babysitter didn't see them leave so they wouldn't need to get back in the house. The babysitter probably grabbed the knife when they heard the scream, and didn't have it when they were with the kids. & yeah, i agree, the distance aspect seems to be more than a little off, but i think they were more-so just trying to say that they were very close, not literally 6ft away.
chimmy 0
it sucks they had to pay a babysitter to get some "privacy." not ur business what they choose to do.
kellster 2
I call fake. Who let you in, the kids? That would be the weirdest babysitting arrangement ever. If the kids were old enough to be left alone while the parents "weren't home", then why did they need a babysitter at all?
whocares111 0
wow people having sex! who cares! god just close the door and finish the babysitting job
circayouandme 0
Ewwwwww....... I'd be so grossed out
DBJ740 0
Why didn't you call the parents before you broke into the room? The parents were out of the house for all you know and all the children (hopefully) were accounted for. You should have called them first and then maybe called some other for of authority or at least knocked on the door before you picked the lock. Not to put all the tardness on you....the parents shouldn't have even been getting down with all those people in the house...especially when they hired a baby sitter....you shouldn't have been put through this at all. You three all are kind if dumb....I can only laugh at what I think the kids you took care of that night are like.
aceofspades08 0
hey... you got paid for it, i don't see a problem.