Today, I went to a wake. When my dad picked me up, I was still pretty upset. Just when I'd had enough of death, the car hits a raccoon on the way home. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad and I were in the car when a rabbit scurried across the road, just missing us. My dad turned and said to me, "Well, it's good we didn't hit him. He gets to live another day." I then looked in the rear view mirror to see the rabbit running away from the cross traffic, only to be hit by the car behind us. FML
Today, my mother's beloved cat died and we thought it would be nice to bury it in the back yard. I came home from work and while walking to the door saw that the cat had been dug up and partially eaten by the local raccoons and strays. FML
Today, I drove home on my birthday, and my mom said she'd meet me there. I was a little surprised to get home and find she wasn't there, but even more shocked to see my rabbit run over in my driveway. Turns out he'd gotten loose and my mom had run him over, panicked, and left. FML
Today, I ran over a cat while driving home. I tried to keep myself together but couldn't help but cry because of how bad I felt. Through my tears I failed to notice a porcupine in the middle of the road. Yep, I hit him too. FML
Today, I was out jogging. As I took a rest to have a drink of water, a car pulled onto the sidewalk and bumped into me. Not just any car; my dad's car. He then drove away. FML
Today, I hit a deer. The worst part? Papa deer saw me hit mama deer, and proceded to ram into my car. FML
Today, I had to put my 17 year-old cat down. I cried the whole way up to the vet's office and back. After finally coming to terms with the situation, and trying to forget, my dad's friend walks up to me and says, "So, I heard you killed your cat?" FML
Today, I was bringing the garbage cans inside and noticed one felt a little heavy. I opened it, only to find a raccoon. A very angry raccoon. FML
Today, my dad is such an asshole, he pulled out into traffic because he was too impatient to wait, which is how we ended up in the middle of a funeral for 5 miles, right behind the hearse. It was the funeral of a friend's dad and now I have 87 missed calls from her, and I’m too scared to answer. FML
Today, I bought a new car. Twenty-five minutes into driving it home, I hit a deer. FML
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Top comments
thisiswilli_fml 5
Poor raccoon:(
Jemm_fml 29
A wake is a gathering some cultures have each night between the death of a person and their funeral. It's where family and friends visit the bereaved to support and assist for funeral preparations.
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Comments (87)
live2loveurself 11
What the hell is a "wake" ??
ksks1234 33
What the hell is google?
RedPillSucks 33
We should have a big hole to kick people into while yelling "This is ******* Jeopardy!!" instead of "This is Sparta!!"
rogerover 19
Wake is same as "showing". Body in casket, open or closed. People visit and say goodbye. BTW raccoons suck.
CobaltRaccoon 6
Poor raccoon brother :(
MzZombicidal 36
Why go on YouTube when you can find some on Facebook?
Mitch17FML 3
Really? **** your life? Who cares it's a raccoon. That's nothing to make a big deal out of. It should be FTRL. **** That Racoon's Life.
larrybudd 6
Sorry about asking, but what is a wake?
ulissey_fml 22
Your name is MacGill, but you call yourself Lil ?
delay1234 19
Aw poor raccoon
sanecatlady 13
Was it daylight? Raccoons are nocturnal and if one is awake during the day they're probably sick with rabies or some other disease. Killing it may have been a good thing after all.
DARKDAY07 16
from what I understand a wake is a funeral