Today, I went to a wake. When my dad picked me up, I was still pretty upset. Just when I'd had enough of death, the car hits a raccoon on the way home. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad and I were in the car when a rabbit scurried across the road, just missing us. My dad turned and said to me, "Well, it's good we didn't hit him. He gets to live another day." I then looked in the rear view mirror to see the rabbit running away from the cross traffic, only to be hit by the car behind us. FML
Today, my mother's beloved cat died and we thought it would be nice to bury it in the back yard. I came home from work and while walking to the door saw that the cat had been dug up and partially eaten by the local raccoons and strays. FML
Today, I drove home on my birthday, and my mom said she'd meet me there. I was a little surprised to get home and find she wasn't there, but even more shocked to see my rabbit run over in my driveway. Turns out he'd gotten loose and my mom had run him over, panicked, and left. FML
Today, I ran over a cat while driving home. I tried to keep myself together but couldn't help but cry because of how bad I felt. Through my tears I failed to notice a porcupine in the middle of the road. Yep, I hit him too. FML
Today, I was out jogging. As I took a rest to have a drink of water, a car pulled onto the sidewalk and bumped into me. Not just any car; my dad's car. He then drove away. FML
Today, I hit a deer. The worst part? Papa deer saw me hit mama deer, and proceded to ram into my car. FML
Today, I had to put my 17 year-old cat down. I cried the whole way up to the vet's office and back. After finally coming to terms with the situation, and trying to forget, my dad's friend walks up to me and says, "So, I heard you killed your cat?" FML
Today, I was bringing the garbage cans inside and noticed one felt a little heavy. I opened it, only to find a raccoon. A very angry raccoon. FML
Today, my dad is such an asshole, he pulled out into traffic because he was too impatient to wait, which is how we ended up in the middle of a funeral for 5 miles, right behind the hearse. It was the funeral of a friend's dad and now I have 87 missed calls from her, and I’m too scared to answer. FML
Today, I bought a new car. Twenty-five minutes into driving it home, I hit a deer. FML
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Top comments
thisiswilli_fml 5
Poor raccoon:(
Jemm_fml 29
A wake is a gathering some cultures have each night between the death of a person and their funeral. It's where family and friends visit the bereaved to support and assist for funeral preparations.
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Comments (87)
mirokuboy2 20
Hopefully it didn't suffer :(
rebel_mystic 11
sorry bout the family member passing but I just gotta say it was just a racoon.
cyttex 13
It's not that it's the fact that op is sad from another death only to have to witness more death.
rebel_mystic 11
I understand that but I was 12 years old and lost my mom then half of the family right after and when we hit animals on the road it didn't bother me. its part of life. everyone dies at some point.
ksks1234 33
But not everyone deals with grief the same way. Just because you are comfortable with death, doesn't mean OP will be.
ninjuh_wingman 29
Everyone deals with death in different ways. The OP just feels that right now they're at the point where anything dying is terrible even if it is a raccoon.
AssassinBug 15
It is such a shame. But don't worry, at least it was probably painless!
Zebediabolical 45
Unless they just broke it's back and it had to drag itself off the road to die in the ditch.
Edumcg 24
#22 what the hell is wrong with you? that's the worst way to see it.
RedPillSucks 33
I feel really bad that #22 comment made me laugh. Unfortunately a lot of things that get hit by cars don't die right away, and that's of absolutely no help to OP at all.
Jemm_fml 29
#51 - it could be worse, suppose the racoon's life insurance company doesn't want to cover accidental death and its wife and kids have to pay for its funeral out of pocket? That plus their dad dying in a ditch must suck.
cheshirecat13242 32
I'd say it's ok to skip the coon's wake..
iknowiwantyou 13
I remember once I hit something while driving and when I looked in my rear view mirror I could see it squirming. poor thing I thought. and then I forgot about it 2 seconds later.
katties 27
You sound like a ******* asshole! I almost hope someone hits you with his car and is like "whatever" and drives away. A year ago someone drove over our kitten and didn't even stop. This happened in front of my mom, her friends and my sister. They ran up to it and had to comfort it till the poor creature died a good 5 minutes later.
iknowiwantyou 13
I'm sorry I couldn't go back and comfort the, most likely, rabies infested animal. I was on the freeway.
iknowiwantyou 13
also 35, what was your kitten doing outside on the roads? domesticated cats are to be kept inside to prevent such things.
katties 27
Domestic cats aren't MEANT to live inside - some people are just not fortunate enough to be able to let the cat be outside. Domestic cats are aloud to be outside when you have a house in a place that usually isn't visited by such assholes. And that can had taught itself to use the cross-walk as it is intended to be used. All normal people stopped when they saw a cat crossing the road at the designated place. Hitting animals on the freeway is normal - they are stupid like that sometimes, but it was nowhere stated in your first comment. It's an important detail.
ksks1234 33
39-- According to whom? I know quite a few people that have inside/ outside cats. The cats hate to be constantly locked inside the house. Maybe the cat had ran out of the house.
iknowiwantyou 13
are you guys joking? it's common sense to keep your cat inside where it can't get attacked by other animals, get lost, be susceptible to outside diseases or get hit by ******* cars. a cat can be perfectly happy staying inside.
katties 27
There aren't really any cat diseases where I live: cats can roll around on the ground all day and not get even lice - we don't have it here. There are no raccoons, foxes or other animals that can attack the cat. Dogs walk on leaches, unless they are specially trained to not react to cats, humans or loud noises. During the relatively short life of a cat where I live it gets unlucky about as often as humans. Should YOU then live inside your whole life? Since it's as dangerous out there for you as for the cat, I mean.
RedPillSucks 33
While I think #35 response was kind of harsh, there are lots of places where outdoor cats are fine. In less congested areas like suburbs or rural areas, for instance. I can understand that a city dweller might not want to have their cats roaming outside, but that's an issue for each owner and shouldn't be a blanket statement.
iknowiwantyou 13
53 if you are actually being serious about that comparison, no as a human being I shouldn't be confined inside my house all day. It's because cats don't have work and school. And I highly doubt a stray dog or cat would think of attacking me because they're generally scared of humans or that a hawk will capture me and take me away. I hope you understand now why your comparison is ridiculous.
Ins0mau 20
Another problem is that cats tend to kill native animals and birds. Although, I'd hate to keep my cat indoors all the time.
ninjuh_wingman 29
Cats kill animals so that you know what they're capable of. They're kind of sadistic that way.
worldclassrager 41
It's like some animals want to get hit...don't worry OP...things will get better...
cyttex 13
Because that cheers most people up right?
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Have you ever considered philosophy as a career path? You're damn good at it.
martin8337 36
Better than hitting a person.
sempiternal80816 9
YDI because raccoons are just poisonous creatures, FYL because you had to go to a wake. Those are boring AF.
SilverInGray 25
There's nothing wrong with raccoons, and I doubt the op is upset because the wake was boring.
BeepBeepSwerve 9
wow #31, you're such a dumbass.
Edumcg 24
#31 People like you are poisonous creatures.
cheshirecat13242 32
#31--being that you're 14, I could understand not knowing something due to not having been taught. However, it's disheartening to see that your generation believes & claim such ludicrous things like raccoons are "poisonous creatures." Maybe you should re-take a class or 2...or just not post anything till you're 30.