Today, I went to a fast food restaurant. The guy behind me was a pretty hot latin guy. When I went to pay, my purse fell off the counter. My birth control pills, a condom, 3 super plus tampons and an extra pair of underwear I keep in there for emergencies fell out at his feet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was at a restaurant with a girl I like, and as I was getting my wallet out, I dropped a condom. She didn't see anything, and I didn't dare pick it up in case I drew attention to the "object". The waiter walked past, picked up, and held it out to me with a huge grin. FML
Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML
Today, I had just reached in my purse without looking to grab a granola bar when my boss walked in my office. We talked for a few minutes as he kept giving me strange looks and looking at my hand. He left and I realized I hadn't taken a granola bar out, but a tampon instead. FML
Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML
I'm a wreck
Today, I wrecked my car and got rushed to the emergency room. While strapped to a gurney, a nurse reached in my back pocket, grabbed my wallet and pulled the velcro keeping my wallet shut. The entire room immediately started laughing as condoms and loose change went flying everywhere. FML
Today, I had my first real meeting with my girlfriend's parents. We had dinner at a pretty upscale restaurant and everything was going great. When the check came, I offered to pay and I stood up to take out my wallet. When I opened it, 3 condoms fell out on the table in front of them. FML
Today, I was trying on some clothes in the store's changing room, when someone reached under the door and grabbed my purse, shoes, and pants. FML
Classy
Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML
Acting kinda sus
Today, I bought a box of tampons and went to the store restroom to insert one. I then put the box inside my purse. On my way out, I got stopped by security, who yelled at me to empty my purse. He grabbed my bag, spilling the tampons everywhere. Apparently, he thought I was stealing. FML
Today, while out at dinner with my boyfriend, I accidentally ripped out my tampon picking a wedgie. FML
Top comments
Pop_and_Pixels 0
Man, that's rough. But I understand where you're coming from. I have tons of stuff in my purse as well "just in case". Tissues, a miniature magnifying glass, a small first aid kit, a deck of Indiana Jones themed playing cards, a rape whistle, a pocketknife... everything but the kitchen sink. You never know what could happen...
kile88 2
and that's why you put it all in that little zip up compartment that bags come with so that doesn't happen
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Comments (69)
Jllybn 0
I can't tell if #1 is being sarcastic because it wasn't necessary to say that he was latin or if they are really that stupid.
turbogirl 0
At least he knows you're safe... Did he ask you for your number? Lol.
LeCorsaire_fml 0
Obviously you are pretty obsessed with sex. I mean, who carries "that much" preparation around on a regular day?
HeyThereGorgeous 0
#7 ... apparently you've never had your period in your underwear in public before, well, other people have .
PanicBuddy 0
LOOL !
Kel_x 0
Ugh. Please die.
kile88 2
and that's why you put it all in that little zip up compartment that bags come with so that doesn't happen
Asdfghjkl09 0
jews
MalcolmX_fml 0
This womans READY for some ****. Come my way, sexy lady ;) Red or not, i'll tap tht pussy HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA sickipedia(dot)org FTW
chaos753159 4
r U a ****??