Today, I went out to a nice restaurant for my friend's birthday. I went to the bathroom and heard the woman in the other stall crying. She couldn't pull her underwear up over her obese, old-lady ass because her arms don't reach that far anymore. I was the only one there. I had no choice. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a public bathroom with the runs when I noticed my stall didn't have any toilet paper. I was the only one in the bathroom, and I thought I could make it to the stall next to me and grab some with my pants down. I wasn't actually the only one in there. FML
Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML
Today, I was waiting in line to use the bathroom. I complained to the guy next to me about how long the lady was taking. I kept making jokes about it, but he never seemed to laugh. Finally, the door opened and out came a lady in a wheelchair. The guy next to me was her husband. FML
Today, I took my brother to the bathroom at a restaurant. The stall next to mine was locked, so I assumed he was still in there. I yelled his name a few times, then banged on the door out of annoyance. I gave up and returned to the table, where he was sitting with a grin. Turns out I just traumatized a poor lady in the stall. FML
Today, I really had to take a shit. My coworker had gone on lunch break and I was alone in the shop. There were no customers, so to the can I went. Cue a long series of loud wet farts and splashes, followed by the flush. I emerged to see the horrified face of some old lady and her grandson who'd heard everything. FML
Today, I was shopping in a mall when I needed to go to the bathroom. One of the toilets was out of order, so I went to the other toilet. After that, there was no toilet paper, so when I saw tissue in the sink, I left the stall with my pants down and someone saw me. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom in a mall. As I was in the stall, a woman tried to open it. I yelled out that's it was occupied but she kept shaking it to open it. It came up to the point where she had to crawl under the door to see that I was there. FML
Today, I really had to pee so I took the only stall that was available in the bathroom: the handicapped stall. A girl in a wheelchair came in seconds later and cursed at me for taking her designated spot. FML
Today, while in a public bathroom, I threw out my back. A stranger had to help me pull up my pants. FML
Today, I had no choice but to use a public bathroom. I have issues going when there are others in the stalls, and apparently another person did as well. We both sat there in silence, waiting stubbornly for the other to give up and leave so we could go. It’s been 20 minutes. FML
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Top comments
klbrend 0
Oh god. That sucks. Kudos to you for being such a nice person though.
dudemitch 0
ew. you had a choice. the fact that you actually helped probably just guaranteed you a space in heaven. fyl, but your still the nicest person ever.
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Comments (408)
dansk 0
Today I was in the bathroom at a nice restaurant and I couldn't reach my underwear to pull it up over my ass because my arms don't reach that far anymore. I was so embarrassed that I started crying. Suddenly a girl I didn't know offered to help me. She was the only one there. I had no choice. FML
I2OI3 0
OH NO! SOME THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T UN-EXPERIENCE - AND THIS IS CERTAINLY ONE OF THOSE. YOU DESERVE A MEDAL OF SOME SORT.
plexico 4
Obese ladies panties: $8.99 Tip for bathroom attendant: $1.00 Having to bury your face in fat, old-lady muff: priceless. But, seriously, you deserve a gold star. Sure, it's an FML today, but the angels in heaven are weeping because they are not able to do such a good and kind deed as you have done.
cough 0
um. gross.
depechemode 0
Hahahahahahhaaaaa, That's by far the funniest FML I ever read! ahahahahaha. Sucks for you though. You are the sweetest person btw! (Btw. This must happen to the woman more often,thus she might be a perv waiting in restrooms for other people to touch her! Hmm. Or she was just a sad woman, I feel bad for her too. FMCD man.)
AoME_fml_fml 0
man ur thoughts are harsh and your actions were helpful
_elly_beth_ 0
That sucks, but hopefully karma will pay you back for your nice deed.
kendalle_fml 0
I don't know why everyone is saying you are so nice. You call her fat and gross, you are mean. Intentions are everything, helping someone and hating it and thinking they are nasty and you wish you didn't have to is just horrible
SIMRRF 0
I would like to see what you would have been thinking if you were in that situation.
boreddoubletears 0
But if you don't think it's gross, you're not being nice. It wouldn't affect you at all.
RebeccaRFT 18
She was fat and gross.
lala150 24
Thank you! I was thinking exactly that while reading all of these comments. People are acting like this girl's a saint! Sure it was nice that she helped when she could've just left, but honestly the impression I get from the way OP worded the FML is that she has absolutely no empathy or compassion at all. She sounds like a terrible person that made a good choice when she helped.
Stephie_fml 0
Aw, that's so sad. Poor lady. It was really nice of you to help her, even if it was a little icky.
Juiceboxx207 0
You sound like a douchebag. Icant wait until you become that lady and need to be helped to get your clothes on.