Today, I wasn't feeling too well and consequently threw up. In an effort to get some sympathy, I told my mom about what happened. Rather than trying to make me feel better, she yelled at me because I threw up in the bathroom sink "when the damn toilet is two feet away." Thanks mom. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was woken up to my mother screaming obscenities at me, all because I threw up last night after days of not feeling well, and the flushing of the toilet afterwards woke her up. FML
Today, I felt sick to my stomach, so I told my mother I didn't want to eat dinner. She started accusing me of being anorexic, so I ate a little bit anyway to make her stop. I then threw up, only for her to take it as confirmation that I have an eating disorder. FML
Today, I had food poisoning and woke up early in the morning to vomit. My mom emailed all of my teachers saying that I would be late to school because of "morning sickness". Thanks mom. FML
Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML
Today, my mother called me a "wasteful child" because I threw up my lunch. FML
Today, a mother and son were in my office. The kid wasn't feeling well and threw up. Mom covered his mouth with her hand, creating a vomit nozzle and covering me in puke. She yelled that I deserved to be sprayed on because I was not quick enough in getting a bucket for her son. FML
Today, while trying to act sober in front of my parents when I got home, I threw up on my mom's shoe. FML
Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML
Today, my mom screamed my name five times while I was on the toilet. When I was done, I went to her and she said, “Why the FUCK did you not immediately drop what you were doing and rush to help me with the dishes?” Apparently, the fact that I was pooping wasn’t a good enough excuse. FML
Today, my mom yelled at me for not pooping with the bathroom door open like the rest of the family. FML
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Top comments
carriedaway02 0
I woulda been pissed too. doesn't take much effort to pull up a toilet seat and then flush it rather then cleaning the sink.
yarbles 3
i agree, cleaning up sink puke is a bitch. you should throw up on her
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Comments (110)
knibbsy 4
At least you didn't throw up in the kitchen, in mom's homemade fruit salad.
andruha1123 5
ydi for not feeling well
abcnonamecba 0
y is no1 replying to no1 and his fruit salad
knibbsy 4
Hopefully because everyone realized that replying to the first comment just to "get noticed" is the worst form of trolling, not to mention annoying and stupid as hell, and has resulted in numerous accounts being banned.
andruha1123 5
threadjacking ftw
atticuz 2
You mad, bro?
knibbsy 4
Well I ain't glad.
s2000lover 0
all jokes aside, that sounds like something my ex wife would say, right before she said to go clean it up yourself.
sixtimessix 0
well shit she was right! why the **** would you wannna clog a drain with vomit then use a toilet? Ydi
matrasveer 1
10 - why does that even bother you? It's not like it affects your life in any way. Well, unless FML is your life, in which case you now have a reason to submit one yourself. Just like the people that get mad at people saying first. The only reason they even say it is to piss people like you off cause it's funny that people actually care. OT: OP the toilet was 2 feet away...
VenomSiphon 13
"Today, I posted an FML using a madeup word "consequentially" instead of "consequently". FML"
XxToriLovexX 0
Retard it's two feet away. I'm sure you can hol it for half a second.
cbroxs17 0
why hasn't anyone noted yet on how ignorant #7 is?
lolpwntdumass 0
Ur mom = right U = wrong nuff said
scrapytiger3 0
mwahahha your mom sounds awsome
psiphaser 0
ydi for fishing for sympathy
TokioxxHotel 0
your mom shoulda been in the kitchen, not yelling at you. tighten her chain!
dan13mey 0
you're a dumbass. why didn't you go for the toilet?
RubberDelight 0
obvious sarcasm ...
CvBobo 0
lol my sister did that one and my mom was okay w/it and I pick all the strawberries out of fruit salads : ) ( :
Clare420 0
umm I agree with your mom. it's two feet away and then you can FLUSH. now you have to clean it up...
fawfulster 11
Why would she deserve it? It's the sink! I throw up in the toilet and when there's no toilet around I use the sink. If the sink is closer, I use the sink. Why make a big deal of it?
lololol32 0
Sink, toilet. Shoulda just gone in the shower.
NatDancer2010 0
agreed I think it's messed up when people throw up in sinks. sick sry
jade567 0
…I throw up in the sink once because I COULDNT make it to the toilet to spew my vomit...and my mom was totally understanding. FML OP.
Brittneyyyy 7
I actually agree with the mom on this one...
Eyeliner_fml 0
31- Not to be rude but what you said is pretty wrong. People reply to first because they want attention and I like most people in Fml hate that. Even if I'm the last one I will not do that. Now I do not have a problem with people saying first that I don't mind.
hippo23 0
haha OP, I've done the same thing... FYL
Mirorbo 27
Better the sink than the floor, darling. But sadly, some parents don't seem to care and bake a big deal about it anyways.
superbadd 0
yeah I agree
seanreddog 4
I baked me a big deal. I baked a casserole out of it. anyway op was a lazy ass big ****** deal he's sick doesn't give him a free pass to make a mess he's no a baby
MrsxStewart 4
Put some pants on, Superbadd. Sheesh
derpina72 23
Have you ever cleaned a sink full of vomit??? My drunk ass husband clogged our bathroom sink with vomit once, and he was so drunk, I had to clean it. I had to take a plastic cup AND SCOOP VOMIT from the sink to the toilet till it was empty and then I could clean the chunks put with a ton of papertowels. So no, OP'S mom isn't overreacting.
beepelati 5
your mom doesn't deserve you.
GothKitty19 0
Hey even if she would've made it to the toilet,her mom still might've yelled at her cause she wanted sympathy.
yarbles 3
i agree, cleaning up sink puke is a bitch. you should throw up on her
tinkerbell1357 0
my mom does that too
CloudEnvy 17
You can have some sympathy from me. Because I don't feel too great either.
carriedaway02 0
I woulda been pissed too. doesn't take much effort to pull up a toilet seat and then flush it rather then cleaning the sink.
samanthadude 0
6 - Sometimes you can't hold the puke in long enough for that. Would you rather it splattered all over the floor or intact in the sink? Which is a lot easier to clean.
carriedaway02 0
the toilet is probably less than 2 feet away. if you've already made it that far, I'm sure you can take 2 more steps.
vikingunicorn 1
It's easier to clean puke off the floor than to unclog a sink.
ilovemyflaws 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You people are so freakin inconsiderate and rude
superbadd 0
heehee modded this one too
kaykaypopz 0
oh wow, don't use the sympathy card next time, sometimes it won't work.
mistyeyes 0
well she does have a point... but still im sorry :(
Bertj 5
Your mother is kinda right.. Some people wash in the sink D: