Today, I was wrapping Christmas presents for my family. I got a huge paper cut on the webbing of my fingers, the pain of which caused me to scream out loud. My whole family heard and came rushing to my room. My grandma took one look, and scoffed, "Oh suck it the fuck up, princess." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my family and I were decorating the Christmas tree. It seemed a bit unstable, but we decorated it without any problems. Later, while my daughter sat by the tree, it began to fall. Her grandmother stopped the tree from hitting her. I, on the other hand, screamed like a little girl. I'm a 38 year-old guy. FML
Priorities
Today, I broke my toe and screamed, "Fuck!" My mom heard and yelled at me for swearing, while I laid on the floor in pain. FML
Faux pas
Today, visiting my partner’s family for the first time, I offered to help cook, saying I could chop the vegetables. Five minutes later, I nicked my finger, dropped the knife, and instinctively said a very loud curse word in front of their very traditional grandparents. Everyone froze while someone went to get me a bandage. FML
Today, my girlfriend, her grandma, and I were leaving her house to eat lunch. I stubbed my toe on the door while exiting. It hurt, so I stood there shortly in pain. I heard my girlfriend's grandma call me a "pansy". I later saw blood and took off my shoe. My whole toenail had come off of my big toe. FML
Merry Xmas
Today, I was wrapping presents for my daughter, trying to be really quiet. Behind me, the cat decided to climb the tree, which then fell on top of me and I couldn't move. My daughter had to help me up. She now knows everything she's getting for Christmas this year. FML
Today, my family and I were burning our Christmas tree. For a laugh, my dad jokingly pushed me toward the fire. I tripped, and my doctor says the burns are probably going to scar. FML
Emergency room time
Today, I was called a "wimp" and a "pussy" for crying and screaming after lightly bumping my hand on a wall. It’s been five hours and it still feels as though my skin is being ripped off the bones in my hand. FML
The war on Christmas
Today, I was wrapping Christmas presents while watching a terrible Netflix Christmas movie to get into the holiday spirit. Halfway through, I realized I had wrapped my scissors and tape inside one of the gifts. Now I’m sitting here with unwrapped gifts and a deep annoyance at Christmas all together. FML
Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML
Today, while grabbing a husk of corn out of the boiling hot pot, I splashed hot water on my neck, dropped the corn on my injured toe, and cut myself on the counters, all while my family laughed at my pain. FML
Top comments
SabyTheDevil 0
owned by grandma!
ckjacques53198 0
screaming. Was that necessary? You really crave attention.
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Comments (57)
Jess_4602 0
Op, I understand that paper cuts hurt like hell but it was not necessary to scream so loud that your family came running in. I love how everybody keeps saying grandpa. it clearly says grandma people.
melons122 3
hahaha omg I love your grandma now. that's freaking hilarious
at0micmin3r 23
But... OP Is a GIRL, so what's their point?
LiznessMonster 9
I've actually sliced the webbing between my thumb and for finger open, so much that my hand was covered in blood within 30 seconds. Despite that, I didn't scream bloody murder like OP. Yes, I cried and cursed, but screaming so everyone in the house can hear you is a little extreme, unless it's something very, very serious.
wriptidez 0
ur granny is mean
gabe535 0
haha suck it up! I would love your grandma lmao
mahimalil 0
✯ *./ * .* .*♫*. , • '*♥* ' • , '*• ♫♫♫•*' ' *, • ' ♫ ' • ,* ' ' * • ♫ *♥* ♫• * ' * , • Merry' • , * ' * ' •♫♫*♥*♫♫ • ' * ' ' ' • Christmas . • ' ' ' ' ' • ♫♫♫*♥*♫♫♫• * ' ' .x♥x ♥
Kristinky 0
Was this supposed to be a Christmas tree? X]
ShellyBelly95 0
you screamed when you got a papercut... that's just sad...
Kristinky 0
Go grandma. :]
Seethatguy 3
She's right, you should suck it up. It's a paper cut. I've been sent to the hospital with puncture wounds and almost shut a beach down when I cut my leg wide open on something in the waters. I walked it off and I was 8. How old are you and you're still screaming when you get paper cuts?
RazHuni 0
Exactly! I was three when my finger broke for the third time and split down the middle. I still have the misshapen finger to prove it. The OP's reaction to a papercut was the same as a three year old's to a split finger. That's sad.