Today, I was wrapping Christmas presents for my family. I got a huge paper cut on the webbing of my fingers, the pain of which caused me to scream out loud. My whole family heard and came rushing to my room. My grandma took one look, and scoffed, "Oh suck it the fuck up, princess." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my family and I were decorating the Christmas tree. It seemed a bit unstable, but we decorated it without any problems. Later, while my daughter sat by the tree, it began to fall. Her grandmother stopped the tree from hitting her. I, on the other hand, screamed like a little girl. I'm a 38 year-old guy. FML
Today, I broke my toe and screamed, "Fuck!" My mom heard and yelled at me for swearing, while I laid on the floor in pain. FML
Today, visiting my partner’s family for the first time, I offered to help cook, saying I could chop the vegetables. Five minutes later, I nicked my finger, dropped the knife, and instinctively said a very loud curse word in front of their very traditional grandparents. Everyone froze while someone went to get me a bandage. FML
Today, my girlfriend, her grandma, and I were leaving her house to eat lunch. I stubbed my toe on the door while exiting. It hurt, so I stood there shortly in pain. I heard my girlfriend's grandma call me a "pansy". I later saw blood and took off my shoe. My whole toenail had come off of my big toe. FML
Today, I was wrapping presents for my daughter, trying to be really quiet. Behind me, the cat decided to climb the tree, which then fell on top of me and I couldn't move. My daughter had to help me up. She now knows everything she's getting for Christmas this year. FML
Today, my family and I were burning our Christmas tree. For a laugh, my dad jokingly pushed me toward the fire. I tripped, and my doctor says the burns are probably going to scar. FML
Today, I was called a "wimp" and a "pussy" for crying and screaming after lightly bumping my hand on a wall. It’s been five hours and it still feels as though my skin is being ripped off the bones in my hand. FML
Today, I was wrapping Christmas presents while watching a terrible Netflix Christmas movie to get into the holiday spirit. Halfway through, I realized I had wrapped my scissors and tape inside one of the gifts. Now I’m sitting here with unwrapped gifts and a deep annoyance at Christmas all together. FML
Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML
Today, while grabbing a husk of corn out of the boiling hot pot, I splashed hot water on my neck, dropped the corn on my injured toe, and cut myself on the counters, all while my family laughed at my pain. FML
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Top comments
SabyTheDevil 0
owned by grandma!
ckjacques53198 0
screaming. Was that necessary? You really crave attention.
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Comments (57)
thenewspecies94 0
rofl grandma win! I wish I had a grandma badass like that...
starsbAby 2
37-I love ur prof pic ;D my hair sorta looks like that but purple not pink. and OP, ur grandma is either very humorous or an outright bitch
MatGag17895 11
I wonder why most of the people vote YDI because in fact being cut in the webbing of the fingers is extremely painful. It happenned to me a lot with a cat I had serveral years ago. It's a pain I won't forget.
Shinygirlnz 1
Your grandma is MAXIMUM AWESOME.
firefly0219 0
ow!!! Omg that hurts
iliketurdles 7
that's what she said.
ghbetuehe 0
Shit that must have hurt like hell :/
LouderThanEver 0
Don't hate on Washingtian ; there the best !
mashimarox 12
Wow I wonder what got his diapers in a bunch
lol32360 0
ouch
ideasrule 13
A cut on the webbing might hurt, but it certainly doesn't hurt enough to scream so loudly that the whole family hears and runs towards the OP's room.
LilaBear 2
ydi for screaming that loud from a paper cut... yes they hurt, I can understand a sharp gasp or something, but a scream? So loud the whole family comes running?