Today, I was watching an animal behavior movie. All of a sudden, it brings up two snails going at it. I got hard watching it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, one of my aquatic snails banged my other aquatic snail til they both died. FML
Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML
Today, while watching my guinea pigs have sex, I got jealous. Yeah. It's been that long. FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my parents when a sex scene came on. As if that wasn't awkward enough, they started making out on the couch behind me. FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. We were getting into the mood so I tried to eat the popcorn kind of sexually, causing me to choke on the popcorn and throw up. FML
Today, I was awoken by a slug crawling down my back. FML
Today, I finally got to watch some porn after not being able to for a while. All I could notice in the video was how badly the participants were playing snooker. FML
Today, my young son wanted to rent some movie with talking animals in it for us to watch together. I couldn't say no, but talking animal movies freak me out big time, I either start to cry or feel nauseous. Especially ones with dogs. What is wrong with me? FML
Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. Ten minutes in, I was so pissed off with the girl constantly repeating "You like that? Yeah?" and the cameraman's obsession with the guy's ass crack that I started yelling at the screen. Now I'm more stressed than ever. FML
Today, I was watching a video about spiders. When I felt a tickle on my foot, I kicked hard in panic. It was one of our newborn kittens walking. I almost killed it. FML
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Top comments
Komatose 0
Oh come on people. Snails are sexy as HELL! Especially since they're too slow to get away...
ilikerainbows 0
i think i've seen that movie. i gotta admit, it was some pretty hot snail sex.
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Comments (277)
nevele11 0
Creeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepiest thing I've ever heard.
fmkittw 0
if the OP is an insect then somethings wrong- if the OP is a human they might wanna consider what human **** does to you if thats what you get from an animal movie..
fmkittw 0
if the OP is an insect then somethings wrong- if the OP is a human they might wanna consider what human **** does to you if thats what you get from an animal movie..
too_much_fun 0
Snails? Really? Well at least this way you wont have to worry about being caught with having ****. A movie of snails will seem perfectly innocent at first glance...
MukyDaCookie 0
Beastality ftw
sophiepento 0
6 Words- There is something wrong with you.
TheRightEye 3
I saw snails having sex before It was the most disgusting thing I'd ever seen, if I was a guy experiencing my best sexual fantasy and the THOUGHT of snail sex came to my mind, I'd lose my boner for 10 years.
frankenschmitz 0
i recommend slug mating next time. more nudity and action. especially banana slugs. mmmm.
hk_fml 9
Ewwww. I've seen snails going at it, it's so sick. What the hell is the matter with you, you need to get laid
maximilian_fml 0
lol youre a ******* ****