Today, I was walking home when a stranger came up to me and told me to give him a good reason why he shouldn't punch me in the face. I guess none were good enough. FML
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Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking down the street to go to the movies, when I got punched in the back of the head. When I turned around, a stranger said, "HAHA! It's punch a random person day!" When I asked him why he chose me, he replied "You're ugly." FML
Today, on the way to work, I was punched in the balls by a complete stranger. FML
Today, some guy on the street threatened to stab me. I called his bluff, and walked away. He wasn't bluffing. FML
Today, a stranger asked to borrow my phone since his had died. As he was using it, he kept walking away and I had to chase him because he was walking too far. He turned around, yelled, "Stop following me, asshole!" and punched me, knocking me out cold. When I came to, I realized the fucker stole my phone. FML
Today, I saw an old man struggling with three bags, so I offered to carry them for him. He must not have heard me because when I bent down to take the bags, he thought I was stealing them and punched me in the face. FML
Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML
Today, I was out for a walk, wearing a T-shirt with a fist on it and the words "Bump it." A guy came up to me, looked at my shirt, shrugged, and punched me in the stomach. FML
Today, while at work, I was asked if I wanted to leave early. I said no and let my coworker go instead. Two hours later, I was punched in the face by one of my patients, with absolutely no warning or provocation. FML
Today, some guy tried to mug me. Shocked, I threw a punch that somehow knocked him on his ass. I'm now staring down the barrel of a lawsuit since he was apparently only 16 and "acting out" because of his shitty home life, as if I should have just handed him my wallet politely. FML
Today, I got punched in the face by a girl for asking if she was okay after I had seen her crying. FML
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Top comments
dkf295 2
Should have told him that your head was full of unstable explosives and that by punching you he'd set them off killing you both.
ankoku 2
The correct response was to punch him in the face
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Comments (144)
muchagente 5
yeah, like, a good reason would have kept him from doing so. because he acted on a rational basis. that is just obvious. anyone should come up with a good reason for not being punched in the face by a stranger in a few seconds. i mean, in an everyday situation like that, what sort of twit would need time to think?
MJ_CamaroGirl 1
I assume when the OP said "I guess none were good enough" she meant that she gave more than one reason why he shouldn't do it, and he did anyways. And besides, if some stranger came up to you fully committed to punch you in the face telling you to give him a good reason not to, obviously no answer will suffice, and he is obviously not "acting on a rational basis". But either way the OP knew it was coming and should have been able to at least defend herself a little! If anyone came up to me with that ridiculous ultimatum and a threat of hurting me, he would find his nuts inverted up by his eyeballs and himself on the floor faster than he could blink rather than answering. WTF is wrong with people these days!?
Bloodywolf20 9
She may have given the prick a good reason but he hit her anyways Ever think of that
remamaru 0
So.. Sarcasm is a new thing to most people here, huh?
kc1997kc 9
No. they are just too stupid to get it.
fox333 0
well you don't hit strangers.... or women that guy should be arrested for assault
Eorlas 31
you dont hit *people*. if a woman came up to me and started beating me for no reason, best believe im fighting back
TheDrifter 24
I thought that was foreplay...
thatonename 7
so chivalry is completely dead then?
Thabb 0
99- what comment are you replying to? Are you saying that if a woman started to beat you, you would just let her?
atomicbaboon 0
And let the Chivalry vs. Equality fight begin!
flashback.miss 28
wow. what is WRONG with people nowadays?
Wheredidgrungego 12
Surprise punches! They're all the rage right now.
Luvmehateme292 0
Is that anything like surprise sex?
sematariux 7
uhh op why are you so defenseless? unless it was a 250 pound 6'5 hulk or a blackbelt you should of hit him with ANYTHING in your grasp, or just belted him in the lips before he could you
mfmylifesrsly 30
she could be a weakling like me lol. I can only bench 25 lbs with my biceps :(
Jesus_Christ69 0
you don't bench with your biceps.. you use your pectoral muscles and your triceps.
dgr8ing 0
I think the shear randomness of the thing took away instant reaction. probably had enough time to say "what.." before she was seeing stars.
kybabyy 4
Or maybe she's five foot tall like me and not capable of defending herself from an irrational man? I don't understand why anyone would blame the OP in this scenario. Society saddens me.
TardxxxCake 4
I love how many idiots there are who are misreading this FML post. Anyway, FYL hun. But maybe invest in some kickboxing or other defense martial arts so if there is a next time like this, you can punch him back. Personally my combo of choice would be: right hook, left elbow to the head and a good uppercut into his diaphragm. ;)
MurphyS94 4
Or pepper spray. Pepper spray works wonders.
Faz7875 2
Should've told him that if he did u'd kick f**k out of him.
enonymous 9
First rule of fight club... don't talk about fight club Second rule of fight club don't post on FML about fight club
Luvmehateme292 0
Oooh!!!! I'm telling!! You talked about & posted about...you-know-what club...!
dgr8ing 0
^^lol tattle tail WIN
abb31897 0
I would of told him u were part of the secret service for the president and thar u have a camera installed in ur head to where they can view ur location and it would capture him on camera.
sankyu16 0
should said your punching arm was made of titanium because you lost the previous arm by repeatedly punching someone in the face who asked u the same question.