Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, and she asked me if I ever get made fun of in the locker room for my small penis. FML
Today, I was complimented on how big my penis was. I was complimented by the guy peeing next to me in the men's restroom at McDonald's. FML
What the actual ****?
Today, I went to dinner with my friend and his family. I went to the men's room at the same time as his father, and as we peed next to each other in adjacent urinals the father looked over at me and said, "Don't worry, I've seen smaller." FML
Big swinger
Today, my penis isn't so small that I pee on my balls. It's so small that it fits between the toilet and toilet seat, causing me to pee all over the floor full stream. FML
Sorry about your dick, bro
Today, my wife and I were with friends when she said that men who like guns all have tiny penises. "Seriously, even smaller than me!" I added, and only realized what I'd said when the laughter started. FML
FUPA kings
Today, as I got out of the shower, my young stepson saw me naked. Later, he asked his mom why my "pee pee" is so small when everyone says it is supposed to get bigger when you become an adult. FML
Backhanded
Today, my girlfriend told me that if my penis was on any other body it would be considered small, but on me it's "cute." FML
Today, one of my dorm-mates started laughing at a bra hanging to dry in our bathroom. She thought it was hilarious that a college student would still have "such small, baby tits." It was my bra. FML
Today, I noticed that my penis looks tiny in my girlfriend's hands. Without thinking, I pointed it out to her. Now she thinks I have a small cock, and I think she has man-hands. Either way, we're both turned off. FML
Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML
Top comments
seppi24 1
say His ex Sent you a Picture of His Penis and thats Why you laughed
Blacksxe 1
Just say you're laughing at the fact your roommate is jealous of your size.
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Comments (136)
hellojuicyhello 5
Hahaha! What the ****, everyone reads FML while taking a shit? Hahaha
rockman130 0
rotfl
chels1994 11
and now you're making me laugh... its a viscous cycle (;
panderluver 0
Hey, if your lucky, your roomate willl tell that to a girl who likes chodes.
JackXsss 8
YOU!!! your fml made me lough now i have the same damn problam!
kaykaykara 4
Oh please, it's not about the size of the ship my friends ;)
dantee2005 33
Looks like u would know. Offense intended ;)
ashleymwall 6
your life sucks
FLM94 5
This should just be a life lesson that the toilet and eletronics dont go together, like that time i droped my gameboy in there :'(
irishman1989 0
Ahhhhhhhhahahaha. That's funny
javonillom 0
He's jealous of your size!