Today, I was unbelievably horny so I sent a kinky text message to a boy I really like, only to receive the reply, "Not tonight, I'm raging Minecraft, having a wank, and going to sleep. Try again tomorrow." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I felt kind of horny for once, so I texted my boyfriend to let him know he'd be getting some action later. He replied, "I'm gonna fucken murder ur pussy when I get back!! :D" And just like that my sex drive once again crashed through the floor. FML
Today, I got a text message while driving home. I checked after arriving, and found it was a kinky text from my boyfriend, so I sent him an even kinkier reply. He later raged at me, because I somehow should have known he was showing off his phone to his mom when I sent my reply. FML
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML
Today, I was feeling really horny. I decided to send dirty texts to my girlfriend. I sent the first and she didn't reply, so I sent more and more and then I got one back saying 'Stay away from my little girl.' FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to have a sex session with my boyfriend. I sent him a suggestive message, and 30 minutes later he texted me back to let me know he was done. FML
Today, I sent a kinky text message to my boyfriend. Within minutes I got a reply of, "Whoever this is, fuck off and give my girlfriend's phone back." Apparently I'm so bad at writing sexy messages that my boyfriend thought it was a prank from someone who'd stolen my phone. FML
Today, I thought it would be hot if I sent my boyfriend kinky message. He didn't reply so I sent a few more. 10 minutes later I got a reply saying, "Honey, this is his mom and you should be a little less desperate." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
fallout125 2
yes minecraft is that awesome
dudeitsdanny 10
Get a vibrator, and turn on some ****. And, word of advice, don't sext a boy you just happen to like. It won't end well. He will either ignore you or turn you down.. Or use you. Very few of us would date a girl we can have, anyways.. And those of us who would are, in majority, part of the ignoring group. Get some class with that vibrator, too. Try not to look so desperate.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (185)
deathkid1 0
MINECRAFT IS THE SHIT!!!! :DDD
AnotherRandomPer 0
Yeah, try again tomorrow, he'll probably slit his wrists when he realizes you don't have Minecraft on your computer XD
tay069 0
Omg my boyfriend does this too me all the time!!!! It sucks.
FatMan23 10
Well maybe you should 'suck'.
manbeast2 2
"having a wank"?.........british ppl mak mi lol
tylerrice 0
wow, is this dude gay?
sweetnlow15 5
:3
ZombieNyamCat 6
Sorry bout it, your friend like playing with guys and blocks more than playing with your ******. . . Trolololol
xBlackxOutx 1
Minecraft or sex rlly easy option. Minecraft duh
wasdadeal 0
Man 'sgotta build!
DasKizer 0
Minecraft is the shit. But sex is better. Put the two together and you have a kinky mining experience.