Today, I was traveling home with my four-year-old son. While we were standing in line at the security checkpoint, I hear the sound of water dripping and turned to find my son urinating on the floor. He'd read a sign that said we weren't allowed to take any liquids with us. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a busy airport bathroom with my three year-old son. While in the process of pulling my pants down, my son decided to open the stall door. I jumped up to yank the door closed, but not before the line of waiting women saw me with my pants wrapped around my ankles. FML
Today, I was on a long road trip with my son. He had to pee, and told him he had to wait till I could stop the car. He started counting backwards from 10. I couldn't stop in time. FML
Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML
Today, after reading a sign at the airport, my 6-year-old son thought it would be funny to yell, "Daddy's got a bomb!" Airport security then tackled me to the ground. Oh, and I missed my flight and my mother's birthday. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML
Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year-old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML
Today, while in the airport waiting to board, I got the sudden urge to pee, so I ran to the bathroom feeling like my bladder was about to burst. I was so focused on relieving my bladder that I failed to notice the diarrhea covering the toilet seat and the wall behind it until I was sitting in it. FML
Today, my 3-year-old son decided to pull down his pants and pee outside as our local city's parade had just started marching down the street. FML
Today, while on a family Disney World vacation, I saw a kid shitting on a public bathroom floor. It was my kid. He's 10. FML
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Top comments
FalloutScrolls 25
4 year old who can read, though! Go you!
redcode5 17
That is pretty funny, guess this is going to be one of the embarrassing stories you will remember and tell many.
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Comments (29)
redcode5 17
That is pretty funny, guess this is going to be one of the embarrassing stories you will remember and tell many.
shaaza 16
20 years later at a family gathering: "Hey son, remember when you were 4 you pissed on the floor at the airport security checkpoint because you read a sign that said liquids weren't allowed?" ???
CDtrasher 13
Stories told by mothers are always embarrassing.
C0deJunk1e 23
I suppose his obedience counts for something... Hope it didn't delay your trip too much, OP.
crimsonclouds 19
I sense future smart-assery in this one
chirstinap325 23
Your child is going places, I'd laugh so hard.
fragmen52 18
I mean he is at an airport
kitsuneluvuh 12
I'm sorry, but this is hilarious. XD I'm sure it sucked for you, though.
Tripartita 45
"Remember, kiddo, blood is a liquid too!"
FalloutScrolls 25
4 year old who can read, though! Go you!
wondermoose 28
That was my first thought!
enginsteve 17
This!
LyricaSilvan 30
Who can read, and has legit reading comprehension skills. Smart kid.
_Adog2645 24
I thought that was normal...
abfab5300 13
The boy can read, you should be proud :)
Zebediabolical 45
Hopefully it's been freshly mopped and there a 'Wet Floor' sign you can blame it on.
StarkWolf_fml 23
hehe heh well ain't that cute