Today, I was teaching my two year-old daughter how to take a person's temperature. While I was sitting down, she came up behind me and shoved the thermometer in my ear hard. Now I can't hear out of my right ear, and I'm in excruciating pain. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was working at a daycare. There was a 6-year-old boy pretending to be my doctor, holding a little, plastic thermometer. He then, without warning, quickly shoved it deep into my ear. The last thing I heard was his giggle. I think I'm deaf. FML
Today, I was taking a nap on the couch when my 2 year old daughter decided that daddy needed an ear cleaning. With all the grace of toddler-hood, she stabbed me in the eardrum with a Q-tip. Now I can't hear her coming. FML
Today, my four year old daughter came up to me with her finger in her ear. She then let me know that her earwax tasted better than the dinner I made. In front of my whole family. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's to get a checkup. When the nurse stuck the Otoscope into my ear to look, she was disgusted. When she pulled it out, she told me that I had an ear infection, and that she'd popped a pimple in there by mistake. FML
Today, I was cleaning wax out my ears when my wife came barrelling into the bathroom, desperate to pee. The door slammed right into the side of my head and the cotton swab I was using was pushed all the way in and ruptured my eardrum. FML
Today, I have an ear infection. The pain from it radiates from my ear all the way down the left side of my face, so my doctor prescribed me something that makes half of my face numb and pretty much unusable. Tomorrow, I have to give a presentation on strokes for my med class. Go figure. FML
Today, my excruciating ear pain turned out to be a bastard maggot eating away at all the vital things behind my eardrum. The doctor pulled it out, but I’m now permanently deaf in that ear and can’t balance. I fall if I try to stand or walk further than 5 feet. FML
Today, I put the little boy I nanny for in time-out. In retaliation he blasted an air horn in my face. I can only hear out of one ear now. FML
Today, I wasn't feeling well, so I took my temperature with a thermometer from my sister's bathroom. I later found out that I actually used my sister's rectal thermometer. At least I don't have a fever. FML
Today, I took my 2-year-old son to the ear doctor, since he'd stopped responding whenever I call him. The doctor told me that his ears are just fine. He's just ignoring me. FML
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Top comments
star_86 0
YDI for trying to teach that to a 2 year old!
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
she's 2. what else do you expect? YDI.
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Comments (115)
rasellersjr 0
Ya know, I really disagree with a lot of federal laws, and how intrusive they can be, but I would fully support a license to be a parent. Yours would need to be revoked you moron! Why would anyone teach a 2 year old to stick ANYTHING in an ear!? While you are at it, you should teach him/her to stick pencils up his/her nose. Sometimes I think common sense really isn't that common...
LadyTammyA 0
That is true. I have been in that situation myself. However, it still stands that more precaution is needed when storing a thermometer after use. When a small child has recently been shown something new, they are more likely to try it all alone. :) Take care!
Star18lk 0
FYL. You should probably go to the doctor and see if your eardrum is damaged. Also, You should probably go get a different ear thermometer that is shorter.
smashgrab 0
Well, did you have a fever?
tralin 8
41 is completly right. Kids are very curious people; if they see something happening, they want to know about it, and what better of a way than to teach them? And besides, what harm would there be, regularly, in letting your kid know how to take their temperature? Instead of you guys complaining about her teaching her kid this, you should suggest that she teach her kid that putting things in ears is a bad idea.
projectgaz 0
I agree that YDI. Surely teaching very young children to do this kind of thing is a bad idea. Consider yourself lucky it was your ear she injured and not some unfortunate fellow 2 year old at a play group as she re-enacts what 'Mummy taught her' with a pencil crayon.
Daederoth 10
You need to go to an ENT doctor stat. There is a very good chamce that your ear drum was ruptured. Sorry.
PardonMyFrench 4
Op didn't say she was using an ear thermometer. Just sayin'
ulicksam 0
A thermometer is not something a kid should be playing with. It's likely glass and you're not even watching her. YDI for being a sucky parent.
somebodyshy 0
Your eardrum is definitely punctured. Go to the doctor and have it looked at, but the hearing in that ear will be a little impaired for a couple of weeks.