Today, my excruciating ear pain turned out to be a bastard maggot eating away at all the vital things behind my eardrum. The doctor pulled it out, but I’m now permanently deaf in that ear and can’t balance. I fall if I try to stand or walk further than 5 feet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was taking my earrings out and thought I had lost the back of one. Turns out my ear infection has caused the flesh of my ear to grow around and engulf the back of my earring and it is still stuck in there. FML
Today, I found out that the doctors accidentally perforated my left ear drum performing a routine wax syringing. I was at the doctor's for a completely different reason, having crushed my pinky at the gym. They can't fix either and my finger needs surgery, which can't happen until next week. FML
Today, something blocked my ear. I couldn't get it out, so I went to Urgent Care so I didn't pop my eardrums. Turns out my allergies made my ears stop draining. After they rinsed my ears, I can now hear almost nothing. FML
Today, one of my ears randomly went deaf. I went to the doctor, thinking I had an ear infection or something. Turns out that your ears can go deaf entirely without reason, and I now have medication to take to see if I can get any of my hearing back in that ear. I'm only 26. FML
Today, I was teaching my two year-old daughter how to take a person's temperature. While I was sitting down, she came up behind me and shoved the thermometer in my ear hard. Now I can't hear out of my right ear, and I'm in excruciating pain. FML
Today, I was cleaning wax out my ears when my wife came barrelling into the bathroom, desperate to pee. The door slammed right into the side of my head and the cotton swab I was using was pushed all the way in and ruptured my eardrum. FML
Today, a fly flew into my ear canal and got stuck. It was the most horrifying two minutes of my life. FML
Today, I woke up completely deaf, for no reason. My doctor told me my hearing loss, "could possibly be permanent." I’m a composer. FML
Today, I went to a doctor's appointment to figure out why I've suddenly started going deaf. As it turns out, for some reason my ears now produce wax at an alarmingly fast rate. "Enough to make an entire candle before long if you save it up," the doctor said when she cleared them out. I guess this is my life now. FML
Today, my right ear drum ruptured. My family doesn't understand that I only lost hearing in one ear and continues to talk about me behind my back, thinking I can't hear them. FML
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Top comments
Symphoniaes 32
I think I speak for everyone when I say: Y I K E S
Ahmed Sakr 16
On the bright side, It won't be annoying when one of your headphones stops working
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Comments (32)
Symphoniaes 32
I think I speak for everyone when I say: Y I K E S
Lillysar91 20
“Monsters inside me”
Ahmed Sakr 16
On the bright side, It won't be annoying when one of your headphones stops working
Madrias 36
Depends on which side stops working, though. If it's the side the OP is now deaf on, it'll be doubly annoying.
ari330 21
he can just switch the ear buds to the other side
Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20
Easy, just swich them...
UselessWeeaboo1 21
Unless the one in OP’s good ear stops working.
UselessWeeaboo1 21
If it’s on the side OP’s deaf on, they probably won’t notice.
julfunky 29
I’ve owned many different headphones and almost every single one of them were reversible, as in it can be worn both ways. Simply flip it around.
ellyhan 11
That really is an FML.
John Nemeth 14
I really hope they let you kill that maggot.
Allie614032 34
How the HELL did you get a maggot in your ear?? That's terrifying!
tranced_ 45
They're smart, they attack you when you're most vulnerable, in your sleep!
Raymond Wolf 9
annnnnnnd there goes my sleep
cbchawks 14
damn that's a bummer buddy. But at least you can get some good laughs with lighting a fire cracked by that ear and pretend you deaf to people you don't know. :/
gring40 10
Your balance will partially recover as you get used to functioning with one ear. See an Otologist for future problems & solutions.
acmariner99 25
FML of the year right there. This is the stuff of nightmares ... or The Wrath of Khan.
interesting33 37
it's ok. I didn't want to eat anyway...