Kids: Today, I was taking a dump, when my dad shouted for me to go... - FML

By mikey51 - 10/03/2012 01:56 - Australia

Today, I was taking a dump, when my dad shouted for me to go wash the dishes. Fed up with his constant shit, I told him to bite me. He took this as an invitation to wedge the bathroom door shut for nearly two hours, despite all my pleas and apologies. FML

agreeclassic 10 650

vote type 1 41 613

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By Niles - 20/03/2012 17:46 - Canada - North Vancouver

Today, I was taking a shower, when my dad decided to turn off the water to the house, run upstairs, and throw a bucket of freezing cold sludge into the shower with me. He wouldn't turn the water back on for 2 hours. FML

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By obtuse_ballsack - 04/06/2012 20:37 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML

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By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

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By IAmACoolCat - 05/07/2011 16:41 - United States

Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML

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Not now!

By Anonymous - 18/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML

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By :// - 05/11/2013 21:01 - United States - Romulus

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom, only to find my dad sitting on the toilet, blind drunk. He screamed "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" at me. I just wanted to shave. FML

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By unknown - 13/12/2011 02:04 - United States

Today, my dad walked in on me using the bathroom. After rushing out, he yelled at me through the door for not locking it. He made up the "no locking the doors inside the house" rule. FML

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By wowdadreally - 23/12/2014 20:46 - United States - College Station

Today, while shopping with my father, I had to use the restroom. As soon as I opened the door to the men's room, my father yelled that it was the ladies' room. I then turned around and went through the other door, where I ended up getting bitch-slapped. FML

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Not again!

By green and not with envy - 13/06/2014 20:17 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my dad called me into the bathroom, saying, "Get a load of this shit, son" and forcing me to look at the biggest, foulest-smelling turd I have ever seen in my life in the toilet. It's been three hours and I still feel physically ill. FML

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By fml - 20/05/2010 21:32 - Canada

Today, my dad screamed at me, called me a monster, told me he wanted me to move out, and that I better start looking for an apartment. Why? I slammed the microwave door. FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

kut17 11

Saturday 10 March 2012 6:24

If I talked to my parents like that, I would consider getting locked in a bathroom as getting off easy.

singerlove 14

Saturday 10 March 2012 6:28

Because the dishes are SO hard to do...

Comments

rockwind_ 5

Saturday 10 March 2012 10:17

"Sick of his shit" Pun intended?

MsMeiriona 2

Saturday 10 March 2012 11:03

HIS constant shit?

edteach 0

Saturday 10 March 2012 12:29

at least he was relaxed and funny about it... I would have drowned you in a bucket of water for saying some stupid shit back like that

RogueWarrior869 23

Saturday 10 March 2012 12:51

Won't be doing that again anytime soon, will you?

wriptidez 0

Saturday 10 March 2012 13:00

you dont deserve it.. but i guess u could of taken a nap n there

Schiffy 18

Saturday 10 March 2012 13:09

FYL, no one should tell you to do anything while you're taking a shit.

newburton13 26

Saturday 10 March 2012 13:32

I hope you called the cops on his ass.

thewife5 19

Saturday 10 March 2012 22:55

Ha ha ha.. What will they do, there is no child abuse in this story.

firefighterjohn 9

Saturday 10 March 2012 14:02

one kick with my size 14 shoes and id be out. wussy

glittercookies 12

Saturday 10 March 2012 15:05

Would have taken a 2 hour bubble bath.

withasmile 3

Saturday 10 March 2012 15:08

You were lucky. My dad would've smacked 'the crap 'out of me.

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