Today, when my girlfriend walked out the room, for a laugh, I covered my whole body except my knob in blankets. Then when I heard her come back in, I yelled, "Surprise!" It was her mom, who'd dropped by unannounced. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I thought it would be romantic to fill my girlfriend's room with scented candles and surprise her when she was done showering. I lied there naked, with Kenny G playing softly. I heard a knock on the door, so I told her to come in. To my surprise it was her mom. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was coming over for a surprise visit. I quickly tidied up, but not before shoving all my dirty laundry under the bed. When she arrived, she brought her dog in. Her dog immediately sniffed out the laundry and dragged my most embarrassing underwear into the living room while her parents watched. FML
Today, my girlfriend threw me on the couch as I walked in the door. I butt dialed my mom in the process. My girlfriend took off my pants and we got to business. After about 30 seconds of hearing what was going on, my mom thought something was wrong and called the cops to my apartment. FML
Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML
Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML
Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML
Today, I went for a run. When I got home, no one was there so I took off my clothes and laid on the cool wood floor. I decided to call my girlfriend and we started talking in baby voices. That's when my mom walked into the house witnessing everything. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home while my parents were at work, and things got a little heated. We lost track of time, because the next thing we knew, my dad burst into the living room. He doubled over laughing and asked how much I paid her. FML
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Top comments
DarkAngelsBlade 25
Well, it’s on her. Showing up at not her place, going through not her house, not announcing her presence to anyone who may be around. She was snooping, announcing your presence in a home you don’t live in is the common thing to do when you’re visiting or checking up or whatever. But when snooping you’re quiet.
RichardPencil 32
If you were under blankets, you should just become silent and then later deny it was you. Unless your mother-in-law is intimately familiar with your knob.
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Comments (8)
RichardPencil 32
If you were under blankets, you should just become silent and then later deny it was you. Unless your mother-in-law is intimately familiar with your knob.
DarkAngelsBlade 25
Well, it’s on her. Showing up at not her place, going through not her house, not announcing her presence to anyone who may be around. She was snooping, announcing your presence in a home you don’t live in is the common thing to do when you’re visiting or checking up or whatever. But when snooping you’re quiet.
TheSminty1 17
Your MIL generally just walk into your bedroom unannounced or was this a special occasion? Even if this is true she pretty much got what she deserved.
bloopaloop 27
I hope you only found out after she sucked it off
Johnny5 16
Well I bet she was pretty surprised
pjsr 33
Hopefully, it didn’t get too big of a laugh. That’s never a good sign.
Jillian Cosby-Kelly 15
sounds like granny learned the hard way to give adults some damn privacy 😂
JasonThorn 23
As a reference to the title, his "head" was up...