Today, I was sitting at a bus stop and a guy stops in front of me and says "Oh very nice. How much?" I reply "You couldn't afford me." An old guy sitting next to me says "I bet I could" and puts his hand on my leg. I forfeited the bus and walked home in the rain. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was taking the bus home from work. As I was getting off an old man whistled at me, I told him to go to hell and got off the bus. When the bus drove away the old man stood in the back of the bus, holding up the wallet I left that he was trying to give to me. FML
Today, while sitting in a handicapped seat on the bus, an old man angrily approached me and chewed me out in front of everyone for not leaving the seat empty for "those who actually need it." Then he stormed off the bus, stepping heavily on my broken foot. FML
Today, I said thanks to a man who got up for me in the bus. He angrily said "no, not you!". The old lady who sat down is now staring at me. FML
Today, I was on the bus, when an elderly woman stepped in. She looked too weak to stand. She looked at me with sad puppy eyes, expecting me to give up my seat for her. I felt sorry and got up. As soon as she sat down, she said, "Ha! Sucker!" FML
Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML
Today, on my way to school, I was shouted at by an obnoxious businessman for sitting down on the train when a "full fare paying passenger" was standing. I would normally have given him the seat straight away, except I have a broken leg. I showed him my leg and crutches. He still made me get up. FML
Today, getting off a bus, it was pouring rain so I got my umbrella out. A man elbowed me in the gut and grabbed it. When I told my mom about it she said, "That's New York, get over it." FML
Today, I gave a homeless man my last bit of spare change so he could get on the bus. Just as I was about to get on too, I realized I'd lost my bus card. I had to get off the bus and watch as the man waved at me through the window. FML
Today, while I was on the bus to work, a morbidly obese man sat down next to me. When my stop came and I stood up to get off, he just looked at me, said with a smirk, "good luck with that," and went back to reading his paper. I missed my stop. FML
Today, I missed my bus. I had to ride my bike 2 miles. Once I left, some jerk nearly hit me. I flipped him off and shouted obsceneties. It was my dad, offering me a ride. He left. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
erikaisthebest 0
FYL because the original guy that you were a prostitute. YDI from the old man because of your response.
Indiana_fml 4
You actually admitted in public that you are buyable? Well, what was wrong then with the old guy? You didn't even hear his offer.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (213)
soundtribe 0
hahah gotta love the borat quote
alex_vik 1
#81 - She was obviously dressed in a way that made her look like a hooker, and then she pretended she was one by saying she had a price. There's no way she didn't deserve this.
genius_man16 1
thuryn is my hero just so ya'll know.
lenar_fml 0
People who say she was dressing like a **** are ridiculous. The man was probably a disgusting pervert. I've had people say things like that when fully covered. Just because she said "You can't afford me" doesn't mean she "confirmed" anything. A LOT of people would say that in her situation.
LeftHanded_fml 0
Sarcasm fail. FYL.
mylifeisfuckedd 0
You're stupid. End of story.
hopeinstar 1
did #81 read this before posting..there was a old man in the story not 2 teenage boys and to the OP at least you didn't get called a hot piece of butter..i have yet to figure out what that means..but it was the most interesting pickup line ever
heyyou1203 0
You're right, #78, I should just stop being oppressed. In fact, all women should, all people of color, etc. If we just said hey society, could you please stop oppressing us? I'm sure they would if we asked nicely. And of course women aren't the only ones who get assaulted. Where did I claim that they were? However, the vast majority of sexual assaults are on women. If it were 50/50 it'd be different, but since it's closer to 90/10, there's obviously a problem. Granted, all sexual assaults are under-reported, so who knows. And regardless of what group you belong to you can NEVER know what it's like to be a woman. You can try, you can empathize and educate yourself, just as much as I can try to empathize with a black women (seeing as I'm white). But it's not the same, so stop acting like you know everything.
neurorot 0
have some self-respect. if you wanted them to leave you alone, how about not encouraging them with stupid remarks? jesus.
callthattact 0
How is this YDI? The kid said a quote from Borat, she gave him a joking response back, and the old man took it a step to far. I'd say FYL.