Today, I was screaming at my neighbor to shut his dog up. After 30 minutes of bellowing, he yelled back that it was my dog that was barking. He was right. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I yelled at my dog for waking me up growling and barking out the window. He was doing it at the person stealing my car. FML
Today, I went to let my dog inside because she was barking. I saw my neighbour standing at my fence, screaming that she was going to kill my dog with a shovel for barking at her. My dog was only doing it because my neighbor was putting her trash in my garbage bin. This isn't a new thing. FML
Today, I got several noise complaints from various neighbours about my "dog that won't stop barking". I don't own a dog, my neighbour owns the noisy dog. She sent me a complaint as well. FML
Today, the neighbor's dog has been barking for over 5 hours. It is barking directly at my window. FML
Today, most of my neighbours came to my house in an angry mob to complain about my dog barking. I don't have a dog. FML
Today, my neighbor yelled “Fuck you!” at me through his window. My crime? Closing my front door “too loud.” This man lets his children beat on the walls and slam doors but apparently I’m the problem. FML
Today, my dog barked for 30 minutes with me yelling for him to shut up. Guess that's how long it takes someone to steal the rims from my truck. Good dog. FML
Today, my dog kept barking at the door, and I jokingly shouted, "Language!" My mom heard and grounded me for yelling at the dog. FML
Today, my dog barked at his own reflection in the mirror for five full minutes. When I tried to calm him down, he started barking at me like I was in on the conspiracy that seemed to be going on in his head. FML
Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
dirtroadboy 7
jackass
kickazz16 15
Think before you speak.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (132)
ChronicBluntz420 7
That crunchy feeling you get when you are proven wrong..
javierb88 3
You're a stupid ****
RagingWill 17
It's people like you who allow Europeans to call us "stupid Americans".
edgestr 2
Canadians also call you people stupid Americans :D
FYLDeep 26
Dumbass. If a dog is barking for a half an hour straight, that usually means it's time to go check what it's barking at. At that point you would figure out that it's your own damn dog pissing you off.
LolCakes111 7
What you said is similar to another FML where a person is having fun with himself and his dog barked for 30 minutes. When he checked, some of his stuff was stolen. Anyone remember that FML? OP: Check and recognize your own Dog's bark. You never though what it could be barking about...
edgestr 2
Ya I remember that one, funny as hell!
xk75 4
48- you know that your dogs bark nonstop sometimes and you ignore them? Your neighbors don't appreciate it. The fact that you KNOW it happens and do nothing makes you worse than the op, who was simply mistaken. Please be a more conscientious pet owner, and a better neighbor, and take the dogs inside when they bark "nonstop."
kateindeed 5
I've never understood why people think nuisance barking is okay. Go find a dog trainer who will work with you and your dog - it's a correctable behavior. Not easy to correct by any means depending on the age of your dog, but with the right trainer it could be done. How is your dog supposed to alert you that something is wrong if you ignore it because it barks ALL THE TIME?
txgirl09 5
On behalf of your neighbors who have to listen to your dogs bark: **** YOU. Just because the other dogs bark doesn't make it okay. You're still a complete and total asshole. Get a shock collar or *something* instead of sitting on your sorry ass declaring that you won't spend all day silencing your dogs. They're your responsibility.
blueeyedwolf 10
If you can't take care of your own dog and his nuisance barking, please for the love of all that is holy, DO NOT PROCREATE!
blueeyedwolf 10
I also have to say, that as someone who has bred and trained German Shepherds for a police department, you CAN train a dog not to nuisance bark. It is not that hard. #87, your comment about 'No amount of training will prevent that' is absolutely false. Instead of lying, just admit you are too lazy to train your dog correctly.
kateindeed 5
I think your "couldn't care less" statement basically sums up your situation. You can train a dog not to bark with other dogs barking. We have a Doberman that, while we have neighbors with yappy annoying little nuisance barkers, is perfectly polite in our backyard. It took a ton of effort on our part, but it was NOT impossible. Claims of the opposite are purely uninformed or lazy.
kateindeed 5
The doberman I referenced wad purchased as a puppy; I have, however, worked with doberman rescues before from very bad situations. It is not impossible. Start leashing your dog and taking it out when it needs to go to the bathroom, if you go outside and it doesn't go, bring it back in. It's like potty training a puppy, you have to start with the basics. Again, not easy, but not impossible.
kateindeed 5
Was*
that1skaterxX 0
Pineapples :D
LadyCarter89 6
Derrrrrp!
derpster 7
you called me?
A100893 30
Don't assume. It makes an ass out of.... Okay, I'm sure you know the phrase.
ikickgingers 15
It makes an ass out of....?? Finish it. The suspense is killing me!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DynamicDave 11
It makes an ass out of all the eggplants on earth, of course!
DKjazz 20
Hur hur hur, purple butts.
louiseth 9
You're a dick simply because you yelled at someone for a barking dog. For thirty minutes.
Skorone 0
******* idiot
lwilso41 5
Why would you yell at him for half an hour? Couldn't you have just asked nicely?