Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went indoor rock climbing. After finally making it to the top, my pants ripped on my last move. I wasn't wearing any underwear. FML
Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML
Today, while climbing a mountain, I got to the top and then put both of my arms up in a victory kind of way only to trip on a rock and fall into a cactus plant. FML
Today, I was working out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML
Today, while watching a movie with my girlfriend, I had to go to the bathroom. As I returned, I thought it would be cute to jump over the side of the couch and land next to her. I accidentally landed on her arm and broke her wrist. It wasn't as cute as I expected. FML
Today, at the gym, I was trying to look cool doing pull-ups in front of someone I liked. On my first pull-up, my hand slipped, and I fell backwards onto a yoga ball, which shot me straight into another guy doing push-ups. FML
Today, I was working out at the gym. A very attractive girl was watching me work out, so feeling like a stud, I tried to lift a really heavy weight. I failed, got trapped, and watched helplessly as she walked away laughing. FML
Today, I tried to impress my girlfriend by vaulting over the side of a stairway rail parkour-style. Now I feel like I almost broke my legs, and judging by her hysterical laughter, she considers me more of a fool than a stud. FML
Today, I got too drunk at a party and cracked a tooth from opening a beer bottle with my teeth, farted something nasty in a room alone with someone, tried to climb a tree and fell out, and watched my crush make out with his new girl. FML
Today, I took my kids to an indoor playground. My two year-old wanted me to climb the rock wall and ring the bell. I slipped right when I was about to touch it. I landed wrong and felt a 'POP' and agony. Hello, broken ankle. FML
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Top comments
feven 32
Hasn't FML taught you not to try dumb stuff to impress girls?
TrippingOnAcid 29
There are many important life lessons to be learned on FML. Going out of your way to impress someone will likely end in disaster.
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Comments (93)
managator 5
That's a rocky situation
hduebdo 14
Shouldn't the person belaying have stopped that?
hippo1234 19
not if you're bouldering, which he was if he jumped. dinoing is basically only done when bouldering, which means no belay.
Mauskau 36
Dinoing? Is this some sort of insult towards the dinosaurs being wiped out by an asteroid?
doodlecloud 27
I really doubt the hardest wall in the gym was bouldering. OP was probably on a standard wall and was just jumping because he was out of his depth and/or figured it would look impressive. I'm guessing either there was no belayer because the rules were too lax or there was one and they weren't expecting OP to suddenly jump.
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
We girls are unlikely to be impressed by such stunts anyway. Guys who try to show off their skills usually look like douchebags...
hazelnuts 15
This is a false statement; women find it very attractive that a man is willing to lay down his life (in the slim hope) that he will get the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Men will continue to go above and beyond until we find a woman who will reward us for our stupidity.
conflictedebola 20
"This is a false statement; women find it very attractive" "Men will continue to go above and beyond until we find a woman who will reward us for our stupidity." A man trying to tell a woman what women think, wut.
xebi 4
#57, you can't really speak for all women. I'm a woman and have always found that sort of behaviour a real turn-off. Being himself and valuing my independence so I can get my own pot of gold - now that's hot.
juststephhere 23
Maybe next time just say hello :)
Morning_fml 22
Yeah, simplicity is its own sophistication.
PSYqualiac 17
Hi, climb here often?
cmchappy 25
Not anymore 73
Googolman 29
Why weren't you wearing a harness?
alice192823 24
I assume it was bouldering
sarah5745 41
'I had my equipment on'. I'm assuming that he did have a harness on him
razoray9 22
It's probably the hydrolics that would lower him down gently that are broken in this case
StarkWolf_fml 23
I've seen men waste their lives for a pair of ****. heal up and do what you do best.
vlalam 24
girls 101 lessons??? sorry OP, hope u feel better soon
itwontvalidate 18
aww you fell for her
netflixislove 32
Didn't you have someone belaying you?
salamancer 11
You better get the girl after that one.