Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went indoor rock climbing. After finally making it to the top, my pants ripped on my last move. I wasn't wearing any underwear. FML
Today, my little sister beat me at arm-wrestling. I'm a 15 year-old boy and she's 12. It happened in front of our entire extended family and they all laughed hysterically. I tried to act like I let her win, but the truth is that I was trying as hard as I could. FML
Today, I took my kids to an indoor playground. My two year-old wanted me to climb the rock wall and ring the bell. I slipped right when I was about to touch it. I landed wrong and felt a 'POP' and agony. Hello, broken ankle. FML
Today, my 5-year-old cousin came over. We were on the trampoline in my backyard when he fell off and started crying and screaming. While I was trying to comfort him, my mom came out yelling at me for "pushing him off the trampoline" and grounded me for a month. FML
Today, my 6 year-old son and his cousin were play boxing. For fun, I taught them some real moves. I guess my son is a natural but my nephew got hit so hard he fell over and broke his arm. Now I have to explain this to my wife and her sister. FML
Today, after ignoring my concerns and declaring that "safety equipment is for pussies", my husband went rock climbing for the first time. He only sprained his ankle, but is acting like it's broken. He's now playing video games in bed and pissing in a bucket, because walking is "too painful." FML
Today, I was trying to impress someone by doing pull-ups. I got halfway up, froze, and then slowly slipped down like a dying horse. It felt like the whole park had stopped to watch. I tried to laugh it off, but I’m pretty sure they’re still talking about it. FML
Today, at the gym, a guy yelled at me to stop lifting more than his son, because I was embarrassing him by being a girl and lifting more. His son must have been 15 and I almost qualified for the Olympics, but sure I’ll hold back to spare the feelings of a misogynistic 15 year-old little bitch. FML
Today, I was at the gym, when I saw my uncle at the front desk. I quietly went up behind him and slapped him hard on the back while yelling "What's up, loser?!" He turned around. It wasn't my uncle. FML
Today, I tried to impress my girlfriend by vaulting over the side of a stairway rail parkour-style. Now I feel like I almost broke my legs, and judging by her hysterical laughter, she considers me more of a fool than a stud. FML
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Top comments
null_fml 11
e⋅mas⋅cu⋅late [v. i-mas-kyuh-leyt; adj. i-mas-kyuh-lit, -leyt] verb, -lat⋅ed, -lat⋅ing, adjective –verb (used with object) 1. to castrate. 2. to deprive of strength or vigor; weaken. If you're like me and choose to assume the last sentence is not directly relevant to the other ones, this FML could be hilarious in a whole new way.
Wooddaver 0
must be Canadian
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Comments (52)
icanspellgud 0
get over it.
nadsm 0
haha honestly. not just a 5 year old, but a five year old GIRL.
infiniti_G 0
bigger fml if she made it up
marine10_fml 0
ehh screw that guy to comments down you did ur best
blackmessiah 0
dudes a total pussy!
look_its_me 0
**** her. girls should never tell guys to man up, and especially not 5 year olds
Spandexhero 0
YDI
TrekkieGirl 0
lmao....YDI for letting a 5 yr old call you out, and then actually caring about impressing said kid.
Wooddaver 0
...but what if she was hot?
Freeze_fml 17
Pedo alert.
omgmorganomg 0
haha
Caz_the_Spaz 6
drink water, staying hydrated helps prevent muscle cramps.
cea99 0
Yep? Nice picture by the way lmfao
winterharte 0
Pwnd by a 5-year-old.. Ouch.
Secret_Fire_King 0
Yah, she didn't climb the wall..
null_fml 11
e⋅mas⋅cu⋅late [v. i-mas-kyuh-leyt; adj. i-mas-kyuh-lit, -leyt] verb, -lat⋅ed, -lat⋅ing, adjective –verb (used with object) 1. to castrate. 2. to deprive of strength or vigor; weaken. If you're like me and choose to assume the last sentence is not directly relevant to the other ones, this FML could be hilarious in a whole new way.
responses 0
^^pervert alert
LOLYLIF 0
Thats hilarious no matter which way you look at it.
ambrz 0
ehh this isn't really all that terrible of a situation...
CallMeHush 1
I know who I would have tried to crush with my landing.
MagicalPegicorn 0
nah bones are too hard.
CallMeHush 1
Nothing a couple well placed climbing shoes can't handle.
KayBizz 0
you should always stretch before an activity :)
Mac10nikka 0
it was just a 5 year old kid.... omg ur gonna die!!! just smoke some and get over it,......
XDNurse 0
smoke some... maple tree leaf?
Wooddaver 0
must be Canadian
hoopstar15 0
^lmao!!!!!
valen001 0
lol